Hello! It’s me, typing on my laptop, using my phone data because the power is going to be out for a few hours due to the replacement of a power pole.
We are just going with the strategy of hot spotting on devices until they die and trying not to open the fridge too much (although luckily the weather is quite cool).
I am a bit bummed that I can’t do laundry on the one fine day we have forecast for the next week! But by the same token, I do have a legit excuse not to do laundry haha.
I’ve been feeling the SAD lately (Seasonal Affective Disorder/Depression) and one of the side effects is that I spend all of the winter time wishing the days would fly past faster, so it makes it hard to stay present. Which means I’m more prone to be depressed (when you worry about the past) or have anxiety (when you’re worried about the future).
So while I’m feeling creative (it’s such a bitch that my creative mind really comes alive at times like this – why can’t it activate when I’m really happy in the sunshine?!) I thought I’d start writing more. And focusing on gratitude as a way to appreciate the now. Two birds, one stone!
So here are the things that have made me feel happy lately:
Remembering that saying my struggles out loud makes them feel smaller and easier to manage.
It can be easy to bottle things up and let them get bigger and bigger inside our minds. I had been doing a lot of that lately. I’ve had a big year full of changes and emotions so maybe a part of me (usually a big talker) was shutting down. Like I was still talking (can’t frickin’ help myself) but I wasn’t saying the tougher things out loud and it really wasn’t good for me.
Yesterday I was really overwhelmed and feeling a real crisis in confidence. My usual SAD seemed to have kicked in hard. But I shared my feelings and worries with a friend and over the course of the day I a) realised I wasn’t alone (she feels similarly), and b) everything started to shrink in size. By the time I went to bed, I felt so much more calm and grateful. Grateful for the good things and not just seeing the negatives, but also grateful for people in my life who allow me space to be vulnerable.
A spot of sunshine.
Today the sun is shining!! It has been doom and gloom and constant showers for a while (probably not as long as I feel it has been) so today I am grateful for an absence of rain and some blue skies. Soon it will be gross again but I will bottle up this sunshine and live off it for as long as I can.
Finding a new show to enjoy after floating between shows for a while.
Don’t you hate that ‘in between shows’ feeling? When you’ve finished watching something you’re really invested in and you need to find the next thing but it takes a while to land on it?
I really wonder how we lived before the streaming/binge watching age. I can’t believe we would happily wait for a whole week to get a new half hour (including several ad breaks) episode of our favourite show haha.
I just discovered Only Murders In The Building on Disney Plus and it’s great. Comedy combined with a noir vibe. Basically, 3 unlikely friends try to solve a murder in their apartment building and make a true crime podcast at the same time. Nice. It also is a good sign that I was able to get into it, because before that I had no emotional energy for anything but re-watches. Which is a great comfort when you need it, but something new is always nice.
Nice dinners for the week thanks to my meal planning.
I always meal plan to keep grocery costs down and to keep my organisation on point (I am very prone to becoming a chaotic gremlin so I have to keep measures like this in place haha). Sometimes I regret my meal plans because I went too elaborate on a busy week or because I am just not in the mood for the things I bought. Or I just get bored and my meal ideas have been uninspired. This week I nailed it. I have wanted/enjoyed every single meal and haven’t wanted to die at the thought of making them each night! Pats on the back for that! They’re nothing special but I feel good about my choices.
My new earrings.
I’ve become a big fan of a local earring maker. She makes big, acrylic, brightly coloured dangly ones and I am here for them! I have 3 pairs so far and they really brighten up my day. I feel like I’m on track to become quirky earring lady.
Other happy things:
- Wearing just a little bit more colour than I used to. It’s my toned down version of dopamine dressing. Just adding a bit more colour to my usual black staples. I especially love my hot pink puffer jacket (I’ll really be stoked to have it when the Barbie movie comes out and I’m on trend haha).
- Any time the Little Miss (4) is in a good mood!
- Being able to watch so many more shows and movies with Mr 10 as he gets old enough to enjoy more mature things.
- My new foundation. I think I finally found The One. It took me a while. I love the full coverage.
- Friendly exchanges with school mums. I don’t chase friendships (I no longer think just being a mum is enough to have in common with someone so I don’t place any pressure on that stuff anymore) but I do like having those ladies you click with while you’re dropping off and picking up the kids. It always feels good to exchange a friendly hello or goodbye or to have something to talk about. If something develops from there, that’s great, but if not, it’s nice to have the interaction anyway.
What has made you happy lately?