As soon as my husband and I were wed/tied the knot/got our matrimony on, the questions started. When are you going to have kids? When are you going to reproduce?! START HAVING SOME DAMN BABIES ALREADY! DON’T YOU WANT TO HEAR THE PITTER PATTER OF TINY FEET?!!! Which is totally a great thing to say when they won’t be your own kids. Joke was on everyone else, though, because we waited four years. Anyhow, I really want to communicate the fact that the whole “pitter patter of tiny feet” thing is a sham. Who made that saying up anyway? Firstly, newborns can’t pitter patter their feet because, duh, they can’t…