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I’ve been contemplating some things this weekend. Doing a little soul searching about who I am. Why I think and feel the way I do – what makes me tick. What I can do to keep improving as a person. What I should care about and what I should let go of. I think I’m making some headway on a couple of issues and it feels good because these issues have bugged me all my life. Of course I had these revelations in the middle of the night instead of sleeping, but I am grateful for them nonetheless.
Here are some quotes to get you thinking too x
For my sake. Not anyone else’s. I have to bring a sense of peace to myself. Also, in case you haven’t noticed, I can be a chronic over thinker. Nothing has helped me more than making the realisation that I can just let it go. I don’t have to solve all the world’s mysteries. I don’t have to agonise over finding answers within myself when something makes me feel ‘off’ or hurt or confused. Just let that confusion be. Let the dust settle. The answers can come at the most unexpected moments if you just settle the f*ck down sometimes.
Oh yes. I am so terrible at this. I am very hard on myself. When a situation goes a bit awry and my feelings are hurt, I jump in beat myself up even more – finishing the job of the person who (probably unintentionally) started it. I question myself. I get angry at myself for not avoiding the situation. I lose sleep listing the reasons I have no right to stand up for myself – because I tell myself I didn’t handle something perfectly. I tell myself that my voice isn’t worth hearing. That no-one will like me if I speak up. I agonise over whether I am a hypocrite. I then get mad at myself for feeling things I don’t have the right to feel. I don’t validate my own feelings. I get mad at myself for NOT standing up for myself more. I get mad at myself for EVERYTHING! What a waste of energy spent on not having compassion for myself!!
This is a big one. Happiness should come from the inside and radiate outwards. I shouldn’t give power to external things or people over whether I get to be happy or not. I need to maintain my inner peace. I shouldn’t waste my time feeling icky feelings that are only hurting me. I could be busy feeling happy!
I hope everybody has a very happy week x