I’ve just been sorting through my Pinterest boards (my life is WILD). I’ve been cleaning them up and deleting all the weird arsed things I thought seemed like a good idea once. I came across a secret board I’d kept while we tried so hard to conceive the Little Miss (now 6 months old – our gorgeous IVF miracle). It was called, “Planning for Baby #2”. I was able to pin articles on infertility in there and birth announcement ideas etc. It was this little spot on the internet where I could save things I didn’t feel comfortable sharing and occasionally where I could let myself dream just a little.…
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6 weeks post partum.
I started writing this a week ago (the Little Miss is 7 weeks old as I publish this)! Getting back into blogging is harder than it used to be haha. Yep. We’ve reached that magical milestone. Six weeks after the delivery of the Little Miss. That time when you go to the doctor for a check up and you hopefully get a lot of answers that will help you to move on with your life. At least that’s what it symbolises for me! It’s been a long six weeks, but it’s also gone by so fast. That is a shit sentence that doesn’t appear to make any sense but I…
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2 weeks post partum: some thoughts.
It’s been two weeks since we met the Little Miss. It’s safe to say we are totally in love. She’s growing bit by bit but I still can’t get over the fact that she is still too small for 0000 (newborn) sized clothes! While I want her to thrive and grow, I must admit her tiny size is bloody adorable. She is so good and staring at her is my new favourite hobby (coming in at a close second to holding her – although she thinks of me as a big milk machine and it makes me a little jealous of her father and his useless chest region because he…
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15 weeks pregnant.
Week 15 of my pregnancy felt like a bit of a roller coaster of emotions! I blame the hormones! I learned that I’m a bit more sensitive to the energy of other people when I’m pregnant. One example was a beautiful, sunny day when we went out to a community event. There were people everywhere and there was a wonderful, buzzing atmosphere. We ran into heaps of people we know and it was lovely. I actually had a really great time! When it was all over, I felt like I was completely wrecked and on the verge of tears! I think I had just gone into some kind of overwhelmed…
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13 weeks pregnant.
At 13 weeks, it felt really good to see the end of the first trimester! I had worked through a lot of feelings, found great reassurance in the fact that our first trimester scan had gone well and I felt comfortable enough to make plans with people again. It gave me a thrill to take my time walking through the baby sections of local shops without having to look over my shoulder and worry about who might see me. I could peruse the (very god damn limited) maternity clothing. I could buy some stuff in person. I was out and about with my bump and it felt good (even though…
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12 weeks pregnant: Announcement time.
As you might have gathered from my last blog post, I HATED having to hide the fact that I was pregnant for the entire first trimester. HATED IT. While I didn’t feel ready to announce it to everyone (for various reasons), I also hated having to hide things. Because I am not a ‘hider’. I am a sharer. Big on openness and honesty. At least that’s when my soul is the happiest. It got difficult when I started to show. Even though I’m sure I just looked like I had a severe case of the muffin top (probably kind of still do), I felt incredibly self conscious and would take…
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The first trimester.
I just want to start this blog post with a huge thank you to all of you who have been following my journey (can we come up with a better word than ‘journey’?) from secondary infertility to pregnancy. Your supportive comments and congratulations have all been so heart warming and revealing. I think it’s so important that we talk about those hard things. I wasn’t always ready to in real time, but it’s meant a lot to me to share my story – even after the fact. To know you have been there reading along is so wonderful. So thanks. You’re frickin’ amazing. I feel so lucky to finally be…
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Our IVF story: Part 5 – Pregnant or not pregnant?
4 June 2017 (2 years and 11 months after beginning our attempts at trying to conceive) Waiting after our first round of IVF to find out if I was pregnant or not was pretty tough! I had basically coped by talking myself out of any possibility of it working that time. I tried to be philosophical about it all. I figured that if it had failed, then it wasn’t meant to be. I wanted my eventual baby to be strong and healthy and if it wasn’t going to be viable, then I would have to be OK with it. I still had more chances before my odds of success decreased…
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Our IVF story: Part 4 – Transfer day (when they put the embryo in).
25 May 2017 (about two months after my egg retrieval) I was so nervous on transfer day. I’d already been driving myself insane with the craziest thoughts leading up to it. We were to drop the Little Mister off at school and then make our way to the clinic (an hour’s drive from our home). We were going to be a bit early for our midday appointment so we tried to take our time. We weaved our way through Fremantle and found weird ways to stall without actually stopping in public (because I felt like the hottest emotional mess there ever was). I was also trying to stay fresh ‘down…
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Our IVF Story Part 3: Egg retrieval.
March 2017 I had survived the hardest part of IVF – all of the injections and scans and tests leading up to my egg retrieval. Here is how it went… As you can imagine, I was bloody nervous. Not so much about being put under general anaesthetic (I figured I’d survived my first experience with that the year before) but about how many good eggs they’d be able to retrieve. I was also a bit worried about something going wrong and I had to really really try to put the actual mechanics of the procedure out of my mind. Nobody wants to think about a big needle going up your…
