Tag: taking stock

Taking Stock: September 2017.

Hello, beautiful people!

Every couple of months I like to capture a moment in time by ‘taking stock’ (a great idea thought up by Pip at Meet Me at Mike’s). It allows me to slow down and really record what life is like on a particular day and I know it’s self indulgent but I enjoy reading these back months later!

Here we go…

Making: my mind up to make the best of this Monday wasn’t really easy this morning but I think I’m getting there! It’s been an exhausting couple of weeks.

Cooking: a good old pasta bake from a jar tonight. A crowd pleaser that will hopefully go down well (and be easy to make) when our nephew stays the night.

Drinking: I’m a bit obsessed with mineral water and lemon at the moment. Whether I prep it myself, order it at a bar or find the pre-mixed stuff at the shops, I am happy.

Reading: Rosie Waterland’s Every Lie I’ve Ever Told – god damn it’s awesome! She’s so inspiring not just as a person who has gone through some shit and lived to tell the tale, but also as a writer! I am so excited to see her speak later this month!

Wanting: the school holidays to hurry up and arrive! The Little Mister is getting that special kind of ‘end of term feral’ and we are all knackered!

via GIPHY

Looking: like a definitely pregnant person now. There’s no mistaking this bump!

Playing: my ridiculously eclectic Spotify music while I cleaned the house today got me through it. One second it’s all punk rock  and the next it’s Beyonce!

Deciding: on whether to have a snack (like 5 minutes after I finished lunch). I find I’m weird these days. Hungry AF one day, grazing the next. And repeat! I guess that’s what the baby wants haha.

Wishing: for a good night’s sleep. Any night where I sleep through would be amazing right now.

Enjoying: this spring weather!! The sunshine is so good for my soul! I’m also excited for a change in my wardrobe – the best thing about welcoming in a new season!

Waiting: for a parcel to arrive. I’ve got some ASOS maternity goodies coming – yay!

Liking: the fact that I’m recording more steps than I have in a while on my fitbit.

Wondering: if I should get a nice pedicure soon.

Loving: the quiet moment that I’m having right now. Just sitting on the couch with my laptop, taking stock!

Pondering: some thoughts on a potential blog post.

Considering: other people’s feelings goes a long way, I find.

Buying: a new vacuum cleaner is next on my nesting list. I have to wait a bit because we just invested in a family car, but I tell ya – after lugging around my temperamental vacuum this morning, I am more than ready to kick it to the kerb for a nifty Dyson number. It will be perfect for when we have another rug rat and I need to do plenty of spot cleans. I am determined to have one before the baby arrives! I WILL HAVE ONE!

Watching: Stranger Things – holy shit it’s good. I didn’t think I’d be into it – it’s more Mr Unprepared’s kind of thing – but it’s great. WHERE THE EFF IS BARB. POOR BARB. Season 2 comes out this month so I think it’s been a good time to start watching! 

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Hoping: My dress (that I’m wearing right now) isn’t see through in the sun. I don’t think it is? But I get paranoid about some fabrics. It’s one of the few maternity pieces I own and I really need it to work! I shall walk with my legs pressed together just in case haha. I have tried to test it in the sunlight and I think it’s passable, but still. Paranoid.

Marvelling: at all the ladies who work out like machines while they’re as pregnant as me (and far beyond). I’ve seen those Insta videos. WTF, I can’t even haha. It makes me wish I’d been in much better shape when I fell pregnant so I could comfortably and confidently continue a more rigorous exercise routine. Never mind. I’ll work with what I can! Walking will be my go-to (with a little bit of kitchen dancing of course)!

Cringing: at the awkward exchange I had with the person who stands at the entrance/exit of Kmart today. I always feel awkward when I’m leaving that place! Do I walk right over to them and show them all my receipts and let them check my bags? Or do I just walk straight on out and only stop if they ask me? Or does that make me look guilty? Do I nod and say ‘see ya’ on my way out or do I just leave quietly without a fuss? I overthink these things and then it always gets weird 😂

Needing: to gain a little more confidence in dressing my ever changing body. I love having a bump but I still find myself questioning my outfit choices and feeling a little like I’ve not quite nailed it. I am hoping that will change soon.

Questioning: whether or not I’m having a boy or a girl. We’ll find out at 19 weeks or so, hopefully! People ask me if I have a ‘feeling’ about it either way but I genuinely cannot pick it.

Smelling: nothing offensive, which is great considering I just cleaned the house. Carry on.

Wearing: that possibly see through dress I described above, plus a zip up hoodie to keep warm. I took off my olive green bomber jacket so I wouldn’t wreck it while I did housework.

Following: less people on Instagram now. I’ve been trying to curate my feeds a lot more. I realised there were a lot of (perfectly good) accounts I was scrolling on by every single day without feeling the need to interact or give a ‘like’ and that I could probably let them go (and wish them well).

Noticing: that my fingernails are finally growing nicely again after a long stint of gel nails. I had to give them a break because they were getting a bit damaged and I found it hard to maintain everything.

Knowing: that I’m almost half way through my pregnancy already freaks me out! I’ll think about things that are happening late this year or early next year and realise I’ll be a massive, waddling freak by then – yikes haha.

Thinking: about my upcoming plan to eat less sugar and carbs – not to lose weight of course – but to try to avoid a diagnosis of gestational diabetes when I have my 28 week glucose blood tests. I had it last time I was pregnant and it drove me mad. Of course I could just be genetically doomed no matter what I do, but I figure I’ll give this a go anyhow in the weeks leading up to the test. Can’t hurt.

Admiring: mums who have a really amazing sense of humour and who aren’t afraid to keep it real. The kinds of people you won’t see trolling the comment sections of parenting articles on Facebook haha.

Sorting: my wardrobe out last week was soooooo good. So many things I can’t fit in anymore!!!

Getting: my shit together in order to tackle a new week. I’ll get there!

Bookmarking: articles on true crime that I find on Facebook but want to read later.

Coveting: beautiful little baby onesies that I see everywhere in stores and online. I am resisting the urge for a few more weeks at least!

Disliking: “media” outlets that use nasty, divisive clickbait to get people to read their articles on parenting, pregnancy, fertility etc. Regardless of whether the actual article itself is fair, balanced and interesting, you’ve lost me if you’ve used an awful headline to suck people in. It bothers me that this gross tactic actually works. I don’t give these sites my clicks anymore.

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Opening: up about my life again, since announcing my IVF pregnancy has felt so good. I don’t feel writer’s block anymore and I am enjoying documenting everything. It’s probably not everybody’s cup of tea, but that’s OK. I have a bit of a one track mind right now! I get it!

Giggling: at the silliest things makes me happy. Yesterday it was my grandfather’s rather…unique technique for cutting cling wrap. You probably had to be there, but there’s nothing better than a giggle with the fam, right?

Feeling: tired, but good right this minute. The sunshine ALWAYS helps.

Snacking: hasn’t occurred yet, but it might once I finish this post!

Helping: others feels really good when it is appreciated. That’s of course not the main motivation, but it feels good to have positive feedback.

Hearing: the dryer working away. Trying to defluff some towels I just bought. Not succeeding too well. I’m now covered in that fluff (will be a great look at school pick up)! So is the doona my nephew is supposed to sleep under tonight and I have no idea how to effectively remove it in time – eep! I need like a huge doona sized piece of sticky paper haha. #domesticgoddess #not

That shall be a problem for 3 hours from now Kez.

What have you been up to lately?

Taking Stock: May 2017

It’s May! I feel like this year is zooming by, but I’m not mad about it.

It’s time for me to take stock, like I do every couple of months! It’s a great way to capture what’s happening in an exact moment of my life. I find I actually get quite REAL in these posts for some reason. You would probably find out some little things about me that I don’t mention anywhere else. Or not. Who knows. Let’s find out!

Making: time to catch up with myself on this lovely Friday. It’s lovely because it’s Friday and I have a day off from work or boring obligations!

Cooking: is fun on the weekends but not fun during the week when you’re rushed AF.

Drinking: wine tonight. FOR SURE.

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Reading: The Fifth Letter by Nicola Moriarty. I have only just started it. The themes behind the story really resonated with me when I was looking for something new to read, so here we are! I am stoked to actually have something to list here. I am reading more this year like I hoped I would! Not much, but more! Go me!

Wanting: to get to a place in my life where I can commit to anything social/fitness wise/financial without fertility stuff hanging over my head anymore.

Looking: at my Fitbit – I’m charging it right now, so of course I can’t walk anywhere.

Playing: my own music on the way home from the school drop off is the best. I never want to get out of the car because there’s always a good song playing! I think I need a long solo road trip – that would be the best!

Deciding: on what I will do exercise wise today. I think some treadmill time and some Fitness Marshall dance work outs sounds great. I just want it to be fun today.

Wishing: with all of my heart and soul for some fertility success this year.

Enjoying: the quiet. I love the quiet of my house right now.

Waiting: is difficult. I am getting more impatient as I get older, I swear it.

Liking: Instagram stories more now that it’s been around a while longer. I am using it more and looking at other stories more too. I think it’s just an extra procrastination tool to add to my snapchat addiction! I still think they stole it from Snapchat and WTF but it’s growing on me.

Wondering: if the weather will make up its mind about what it wants to do right now. I like that it’s trying to hold onto the warm sun, but I hate that it changes from one extreme to the other in one day! I never know what to wear!

Loving: the fact that I’m finding my own unique style again. Each year I hit a bit of a style slump but there’s no better feeling than picking myself up again and updating my wardrobe.

Pondering: over when I should return to my hair salon and enact the second part of my plan to get really rad hidden rainbow hair happening. I’ve already lightened it once, but I need to go back to get it really bright blonde for maximum fashion colour impact!

Considering: whether or not to start doing afternoon school pick ups through the kiss ‘n’ drop lane. The Little Mister has been nagging me (he thinks it’s such a big kid thing to do) and while the idea of never leaving my car sounds super appealing, a part of me knows I’ve been a bit absent this year at the school with all the fertility shit, so if standing awkwardly at the school gate for a few minutes a day so I get that great after school run-up-and-hug is what it takes to feel like I’m THERE, then I think I’ll do it. Maybe I can pick and choose a few days to do kiss ‘n’ drop when it suits. Compromise!

Buying: jeggings for the first time recently was a little out of character for me, but a great decision (and I can’t believe I’m saying that)! I made sure to buy the ones that basically look like jeans and weren’t too obvious. But the stretchiness of the waistband has been welcomed! My body fluctuates all the time (partly due to constant weird fertility treatment shit and partly because I love food) and I got sick of playing the ‘will I have muffin top today’ game.

Watching: a bunch of stuff on the go on Netflix lately. Chelsea, Riverdale, Designated Survivor. 

Hoping: I’ll get to catch up with some good friends soon. I’ve got a couple of peeps on my ‘must see soon’ list and as soon as my schedule becomes a little more predictable, I can’t wait to arrange something.

Marvelling: at the kindness of strangers. A couple of ladies with really full trollies let me go in front of them at Aldi today because I only had 3 items. They were so nice. That’s the kind of thing that I like to pay forward. I hope I get to do that for someone else soon.

Cringing: at the fact that I had to avoid a good (male) friend at the shops today. I had a bunch of bras in my hand and it just seemed like stopping to chat awkwardly was not something I felt our friendship needed in that moment ? I hid like a big baby in the womens’ accessories section until he was gone!

Needing: a few more nights of good sleep. As always.

Questioning: what amount of cleavage is a classy amount of cleavage. I have had the girls out a little more than usual lately. Slightly lower necklines and the like. Nothing too crazy or inappropes, but it’s kind of a big deal for me. I always worry people will judge me even though they shouldn’t and probably wouldn’t. I think I hid my chest area completely when I got pregnant with the Little Mister and had a bad rash (in 2011) and never got my confidence back again.

Smelling: nothing. No news is good news.

Following: the Facebook page of a local personal trainer who does group boot camps on the beach nearby. Her class times sound really good, I love being at the beach, I need to do something like this, but I haven’t figured out if I can commit yet. So I am watching quietly and biding my time like a really good stalker.

Noticing: that I feel nice and calm today. I’ve needed this after a week full of nervous energy.

Knowing: what I’m doing would be great. Generally. In life. Ha!

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Thinking: about my plans for the weekend. Hopefully I’ve struck the right balance between rest and getting out of the house enough to avoid insanity.

Admiring: people who are there for others, even when they have their own struggles.

Sorting: my wardrobe out still. I’m so excited to actually have clothes to wear this autumn/winter.

Getting: messages from my besties and just talking shit back and forth is always a great part of my day.

Bookmarking: silly videos I find on Facebook that I want to show Mr Unprepared later so he can laugh or cringe. I don’t know if my efforts are always appreciated ?

Coveting: those Dyson stick vacuum cleaner things. Or a Roomba robot vacuum cleaner. One day I shall have one. One day. Just not for Mother’s Day. Because that might not go down so well haha.

Disliking: not much right this minute.

Opening: my fitbit app is the first thing I do each morning. I like to see how I slept. Sometimes this is a valuable exercise and sometimes it’s a self inflicted torture thing haha.

Giggling: about my people watching adventures in the school car park (yes my life feels like it revolves around the school car park – can you tell). I see some really great things that make me laugh (in a not obvious way of course).

Feeling: happy right now. In this moment!

Snacking: has been a problem. Mostly because there’s SO MUCH CHOCOLATE in my house right now. I am not normally a snacker or a chocoholic but the temptation is just too great (and the PMS has been real too).

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Helping: myself to relax by having a quiet day seems to be working.

Hearing: birds making noises in the distance. Which is so much nicer than listening to the recent ridiculous night time cat fights (they are not our cats but they think our place is an ideal battleground – gah)!


What have you been up to lately?

Taking Stock: March 2017

It’s March already. What the hell. It’s shaping up to be a crazy month and quite honestly, the name ‘Awesomely Unprepared’ has never fit me so well as it does now. It’s time to take stock and capture this moment in time!

Making: The most of the little time I have right now before the Little Mister wakes up for the day.

Cooking: All the ‘sometimes’ foods more than sometimes. Must try harder to keep my diet (not ‘diet’ as in fad diet – ‘diet’ as in nutritional intake) on track.

Drinking: More water.

Reading: Amy Schumer’s book. STILL. OK, so not really actively reading it. BUT I WILL FINISH IT.

Wanting: Our journey with secondary infertility to end as soon as possible, please. I have told myself that 2017 is our year and I really really hope I’m not wrong.

Looking: at my computer. Because I’m blogging. Duh.

Playing: all my favourite music on Spotify on the drive home (alone) from the city on Friday was the perfect treat. I don’t usually do it because it eats up some data (I can’t download the songs to my phone because it’s chockers and has no memory available), but it was worth it. I don’t usually use much data anyway, so I think I’ll do this more as I’ll be up and down to the city a lot this month. When my data’s low, I’ll play all the podcasts I never get to listen to! It will be my version of me-time!

Deciding: on things and owning those decisions without doubting myself or caring too much about what other people will think is easier said than done but I’m working on it.

Wishing: I didn’t constantly feel like I’m fighting off a cold.

Enjoying: a very low key long weekend, socially.

Waiting: for new seasons of Catfish and Keeping Up With the Kardashians. I know. It’s sad of me.

Liking: the fact that on this public holiday Monday, I haven’t had to worry about getting the Little Mister to school. A reprieve!

Wondering: why the Little Mister is up so early. I just heard his bedroom door. I know he’ll be good and stay in his room but that’s weird, anyhow.

Loving: my sleep lately. I’m not getting enough (7 hours or less on average) but I’m falling asleep nice and early without spending hours lying in bed waiting for the Zzzs to come.

Pondering: a lot of things. Because over thinker.

Considering: what I want to do with my day.

Buying: a new dress for a wedding soon. I do not know for sure if I’ll make it to the wedding, but damn it, I’m buying the outfit anyway.

Watching: a lot of Ellen lately. I’ve become a cliched housewife. I watch Ellen when I need to be cheered up. I have heaps of episodes saved onto my DVR to watch at any time haha. 

Hoping: So much hoping.

Marvelling: at my resilience. That makes me sound up myself, but sometimes I just don’t know how I keep getting up again and again. I’m glad I do.

Cringing: at the last couple of days and my emotional rollercoaster.

Needing: more alone time. I’m just feeling so greedy for it lately. I’ve already got it fairly good, but I’m craving prolonged solitude!

Questioning: my own judgement. Seems to be a theme with me at the moment.

Smelling: Nothing. My nose has been a bit stuffy.

Wearing: an old singlet that I’ve loved so much over the years, the fabric has taken on a PJ like quality so now I just wear it to bed anyhow.

Following: every Facebook article about Married at First Sight. I’m disgusted with myself haha.

Noticing: a new pimple on my jawline. Lucky me.

Knowing: when to follow your head vs your heart is really tricky.

Thinking: about my life, my relationships, the future.

Admiring: People who have survived struggles similar to mine. Makes me feel like I’m not alone and that there’s hope.

Sorting: the junk in my spare room is a task that haunts me. It’s always the first thing to drop off the priority list when life gets busy. GAH!

Getting: out of bed today will be hard to do. I’m so comfy.

Bookmarking: the result of personality type quiz I did. Apparently I’m an ENFP? I am not 100% sure that completely nails who I am but I want to read over it a lot more and think about it!

Coveting: ALL THE CLOTHES. I’ve only recently discovered that I like clothes shopping again. Now I want all the things that make me feel good. Party clothes, casual clothes, activewear, autumn winter stuff – basically every damn thing haha.

Disliking: the fact that I often chicken out of wearing a bright lipstick. I rock those bright colours and I should stop worrying that it’s ‘too much’.

Opening: the new app I got to track my food (it’s like a visual food diary). It’s called ‘Ate’ (in case you’re interested) and you take a photo of everything you eat or drink and decide whether this food is going to help you with your health goals or not. I think it’s going to be very interesting in keeping me accountable! Note: yesterday I was literally 0% on track hahaha. OOPS.

Giggling: at just about everything on Brooklyn Nine-Nine has been my nightly therapy. Don’t you just love when a TV show nails your exact sense of humour?

Feeling: a bit crappy. But OK.

Snacking: has been an issue for me this weekend. I must remember to only eat when I’m genuinely hungry!!

Helping: the Little Mister under the covers for a morning snuggle makes me happy.

Hearing: the Little Mister nagging me for breakfast!


What have you been up to lately?

Taking Stock: January 2017.

Wow. You guys. We made it through 2016 and out the other side! It was a crazy year for me. Hard work, emotionally. And physically too. I would be lying if I said I’m not hoping that 2017 will be a little easier. Even just a little. I’m kind of tired, y’know? But I did learn so much about myself. I have definitely grown (2016’s manure was definitely a great fertiliser haha) and I think that’s what life’s about. We don’t always get what we want, but we get the lessons we need to learn. I would just like a less jam packed curriculum in the school of 2017, please! Maybe even a bit of a metaphorical summer holiday where everything’s amazing!

Every couple of months I ‘take stock’ and I am so glad that I get to do one in the new year. Feels right!

Making: A final decision on something that I was turning over in my head a bit towards the end of 2016. I think it’s the best thing for me and I’m glad to have some clarity.

Cooking: Nothing. Because I’m sitting in my bed! But maybe later I’ll make some pancakes. I’m just not ready to eat super healthy again yet – damn festive season!

Drinking: Sometimes it’s the only comfort when that time of the month arrives (despite my best efforts). Having a glass of wine or a cocktail is like a big ‘fuck you’ that helps me move on.

Reading: Is something I’d like to do much more of in 2017. I’ve started a Goodreads account and everything. It’s not so much a strict resolution for the year, but just something I’d like to quietly work on. I know this sounds dumb, but I was watching Pretty Little Liars last night (wild NYE obviously) and each time a character held a real, physical book in their hands I craved that feeling. While I do a lot of my reading electronically, I would love to pick up a select few paperbacks just to have that feeling. Might have to get rid of a lot first to make space though haha.

Wanting: Like I said in my little intro paragraph, I want 2017 to be easier. Sure, throw me a few life lessons, but make sure some really big, awesome stuff happens too, please!

Looking: A bit tired, bloated and fed up! I haven’t dressed nice in days or made an effort with make up etc. I can’t wait to return to the land of the living!

Playing: A snapchat video my brother sent me. Of him listening to the Cranberries’ Zombie in a club of some sort in Thailand. It’s kind of a family joke, because when the song first came out in the 90s, I played it over and over (and over and over) and my parents still hate it haha. We send it to them whenever we hear it!

Deciding: that while it really really sucks right now that my shark week is in its worst phase, I will make the best of this day, because it’s a new year and I want to start it with a positive attitude.

Wishing: For everything I didn’t get in 2016. I hope I’m blessed with those things this year. I hope this gets easier.

Enjoying: the fact that it’s 2017. YES. The dying days of 2016 (pardon the expression) were just agonisingly long for me!

Waiting: for the Little Mister to come barging into our room to greet us. I’m gonna yell ‘happy new year’ at him haha. (he did and I did)

Liking: My social life these holidays. I feel like I’ve struck a balance that suits me as a slightly introverted extrovert.

Wondering: If the Little Mister is going to be a furniture removalist when he grows up, because he’s always trying to move stuff and put it where he wants it. So annoying!

Loving: Slow movie days with the Little Mister when we’re all tired. We watched Matilda yesterday and everyone loved it.

Pondering: On what I achieved in personal growth in 2016 and what I can improve on in 2017.

Considering: Whether or not to pause this blog post and lie down or to keep soldiering on. I think I’ll keep going haha.

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Buying: My last online purchase was to support #fashionforaleppo by ordering a couple of fabulous tops from the Sunday Soldiers website (they’re an amazing local business)! I think we can all agree that what is happening in Aleppo is awful and Elise from Sunday Soldiers (in collaboration with a couple of other great little businesses) are actually those amazing people who are actively trying to do something about it. Consider making a purchase (literally 100% of the proceeds go to the cause) and help them to spread the word! (not sponsored)

Watching: The Little Mister running in circles around the living area of the house. HOW DOES HE HAVE THE ENERGY?

Hoping: Everyone has a great 2017. Not everyone will, statistically, but I hope that the good will outweigh the bad.

Marvelling: at how much emphasis we all put on a new calendar year beginning. Even though it’s not the years in your life, but the life in your years, it still seems to resonate with us that a new year means a new start. I don’t necessarily think that’s a bad thing. Whatever motivates us to keep trying to grow and improve is fine with me! The trick is to keep it up all year long!

Cringing: at the fact that Donald Trump begins his presidency this year. Eep!

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Needing: to hire a Lego Nanny (TM). I invented that concept in my head. A person you can pay who will always want to build the more challenging Lego things with your child whenever they nag, so you don’t have to.

Questioning: whether I really should have had pancakes. I feel a bit gross now haha.

Smelling: the scent of pancakes in the kitchen.

Wearing: a massive oversized off the shoulder top because I’m chilling around the house and it’s comfy. It’s amusing how every time I wear it, the Little Mister tells me to put it back on my shoulder because it’s ‘falling off’.

Following: my instincts more would be a good thing to do this year. I ignored them recently on an issue, and learnt the hard way!

Noticing: That all the Christmas stuff needs to come down today. Or could I make that tomorrow? Sigh.

Knowing: more than ever, who I am, what I want (and will/won’t accept) in life, and what I have to offer has been the biggest gift 2016 has given me.

Thinking: All the time. Overly so!

Admiring: you for reading this. I know these kinds of posts aren’t for everyone! Thanks!

Sorting: my house and my life out will feel really good this new year! I started decluttering both physically and emotionally last year and I will be continuing that process. It’s been so good for me.

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Getting: over my renewed carb/sugar addictions will be a massive relief. Let’s just say I’ve partied hard in the food department over the Christmas/new year break and I am not actually feeling any better for it haha. I feel so lethargic and unmotivated and I know it’s because of the stuff I’ve been eating, but I am not quite ready to stop! Oops.

Bookmarking: the website of the new fertility clinic we’re attending this year. We’ve decided to change doctors. Can’t talk about that right now. But it’s a good move for us.

Coveting: more off the shoulder dresses/tops. I am obsessed.

Disliking: Social media people who are all about ‘likes’ and shock factor and clickbait. It gets old. Just be yourself. Don’t sell out. Keep your integrity!

Opening: My fitbit app every five seconds lately. Addicted to syncing it. Even though I’ve been doing crap all haha.

Giggling: on Christmas day while trying to fill my #quickcouch (a weird gift from my brother which brought many priceless moments) with air (and watching my family trying to as well) was probably my favourite memory of the day.

Feeling: tired but OK. And OK is much much better than bad.

Snacking: is a real problem.

Helping: the Little Mister to get ready for bed last night was so lovely. He’d had his first real NYE fun with the kids next door and was decked out in glow sticks and was all cuddly and ready for bed because it was a bit late for him.

Hearing: The damn cricket. Because Mister Unprepared has left it on, even though he’s not even in the house right now. As you can tell, I’m not a fan.


What are you up to right now?

Happy new year!

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Taking Stock: November 2016.

Hello, November! Is anyone else getting creeped out by how close it is to Christmas? I’m usually kind of organised, but this year the winter has dragged on so long that I haven’t felt the urge to get into it! Also, Halloween becomes bigger each progressing year here in Australia, so I feel like we kind of have to get through that hump first! I don’t know how the Americans do it! I mean, they have Thanksgiving too! Jam packed!

Anyway, every couple of months I like to ‘take stock’. Here’s what’s happening in my brain/life right now.

Making: Plans to head ‘over east’ next year! We’ve just RSVPd to a wedding in  the Hunter Valley (I’ve never been – yay!) and I’m getting excited to show the Little Mister a few iconic Sydney sights too!

Cooking: Has been surprisingly easier since I (re)started my Kez Gets Physical efforts. I still get annoyed that everyone wants dinner every night – geez haha – but with more salads and veggies on the menu, I’m enjoying a change in our habits.

Drinking: Alcohol again. See, I rarely indulge anymore. The fertility stuff is pretty all consuming and I usually try to stay pretty sober for most of my cycle because of medications and ‘just in case’ (the ‘just in case’ that never eventuates). This cycle seems like it’s been effed up from the start, so I have given myself permission to live a little before shit gets serious again. I’m loving my cider!

Reading: Hardly anything, despite my best intentions. I am part way through Amy Schumer’s Girl With The Lower Back Tattoo, but I haven’t picked it up since we got back from our camping trip Kalbarri in September! Oops! I have been flirting with the idea of getting into audio books, to get around this issue!

Wanting: To sort out my wardrobe. I’m excited that spring weather is FINALLY upon us and I can’t wait to get my winter stuff moved to the back of my wardrobe (I like to hang the out of season stuff out of sight – makes it easier to get dressed). I am excited that I’m losing some weight too, which could be dangerous because it makes me want to go clothes shopping!

Looking: At my bedroom door, waiting for the Little Mister to come bursting through it at any minute now to demand breakfast (don’t be surprised if this blog post isn’t finished until long after this moment haha).

Playing: Music in the evenings has been keeping me sane lately.

Deciding: To be positive and happy, because even though I’ve dealt with a few emotional/anxiety inducing life things lately, I feel like life’s too short to let them bring me down. There are so many good things in my life and I deserve to enjoy them.

Wishing: I could get more sleep each night. I go to bed at a reasonable hour, but Mr Unprepared keeps waking me in the early hours! God damn it! I’m tired! We all know how cranky I get when I’m tired!

Enjoying: Instagram. I was really really late to the party, creating an account for my blog (as opposed to my personal/private account), but it’s really connected me with some great bloggers/people/small businesses/events! It’s fun!

Waiting: For all the Melbourne Cup posts on social media today. I could not be less into it lately! I love the fashion, but I’m not into horses and I don’t like gambling (apart from the occasional lotto ticket) so I’d feel like a hypocrite if I got too excited about it one day a year!

Liking: My social plans for November so far.

Wondering: If I’ll be productive today or lazy? I could do with both haha.

Loving: My husband. He’s been pretty awesome lately (ha – lately). I’m very grateful.

Pondering: On all the sentimental stuff that runs through my head around the time of the Little Mister’s birthday. He’s turning 5 in a few days – OMG!

Considering: My work options for next year. With the Little Mister in full time school, I’m wondering if I can find some more ways to bring a little extra moolah in.

Buying: A ripped denim skirt (HAS to be ripped) and an insulated bag for the Little Mister’s lunchbox. Online. Because summer is coming. It thrills me. Shut up.

Watching: X Factor. I KNOW. I can’t help it. I know I’m the only (grown/self respecting) person in the world who is thinking about this, but I think that Brentwood duo should try singing GroupLove’s Welcome To Your Life. I also think that the Amalia girl should sing Evanescence stuff for the inevitable ‘rock’ week. I am getting way too many opinions for someone who says they don’t really care about it. Yes, I’m concerned about me too. 

Hoping: The Little Mister keeps playing quietly/happily today!

Marvelling: At all the pics of everyone’s Halloween outfits from yesterday/last weekend. While I am yet to partake in any of that stuff (and can even be a tad very grinchy about it), I do admire a creative fancy dress situation.

Cringing: At the fact that my face looks old, tired and dry today. I really need to put some more effort into looking after it. It’s my money maker! Bahaha. Kidding about the money maker bit. Obviously.

Needing: To get to a vet appointment for my dog that I totally forgot about – oh shit! Is what I would have written if I’d had time when that just happened haha. I’m glad that Past Kez went on a calendar organising spree or I’d never have got there!

Questioning: Why I ever showed the Little Mister the show Full House. Because now he is fucking obsessed!

Smelling: Sunscreen as we just got back from a walk to the shops.

Wearing: Active-wear. Because walk to the shops.

Following: A bunch of great bloggers who don’t troll people on the internet.

Noticing: That my neck is sore because last night I fell into a coma like state, sleeping very deeply in an awkward position.

Knowing: That being myself is my biggest asset is incredibly reassuring. It’s a  work in progress, but I love how my confidence grows the older I get.

Thinking: I’m glad I took that walk to the shops. I feel so much better for it.

Admiring: One of my friends who kicks arse in Fitbit step challenges consistently. Goals!

Sorting: Out my life. Bit by bit. So just the usual haha.

Getting: Excited to celebrate the Little Mister’s birthday this weekend.

Bookmarking: All the videos I find in my Facebook feed, that I can’t watch around the Little Mister!

Coveting: A nice big desk top computer for when my office is sorted (it has taken FOREVER). Sure, I won’t be able to afford one, for like, forever. But I shall get there! At the very least, my kid being at school will make an awesome excuse eventually haha.

Disliking: The fact that my office isn’t sorted out. All I need is nice carpet and then it’s practically done and I can just move everything back in and make it pretty!

Opening: My eyes in the morning is a struggle, but somehow I still manage to peek at my iPhone with one of them anyway! #addicted

Giggling: When I reminisce on a ridiculous conversation I had with my girlfriends over dinner a couple of weeks ago. We were cry-laughing and it was SO GOOD.

Feeling: Tired but content.

Snacking: Nope. Haha. Occasionally, you might see me scoffing down a square of Pana Chocolate (it’s amazing), but I am trying really hard to stay focused on eating well and not indulging in unhealthy ‘treats’.

Helping: Is something the Little Mister tries to do all most of the time and I love him so much for it.

Hearing: The Little Mister coughing. WHERE DID HE GET THIS COUGH. Winter is over! Fuck off, germs!


So, if you made it to the end of that, you deserve a medal!

What have you been up to lately? 

Taking Stock: September 2016 edition.

Yes. It’s officially spring (even if the weather hasn’t been notified yet)! I’ve really needed it to be spring. Winter felt like it went on forever this year. We apparently just had our coldest August in a couple of decades (don’t quote me on that – I haven’t fully fact checked)! I believe it.

Every couple of months I like to take stock and capture where I’m at in a particular moment. It’s been really interesting to read back and remember the  things I was doing/feeling when I last posted.

Here goes!

Currently…

Making: Lots of snot. Ha. What an opener. But really. Enough with the winter illnesses. It’s spring now and I’m hoping this is the last of it, damn it!

Cooking: Hasn’t been as fun lately. I used to enjoy it a lot. Now it feels like an unnecessary burden every evening! I was talking about this with friends the other day. We were saying how we’ll get excited to make something but then the moment will come where we actually have to, and the enthusiasm just drains away and we remember that our kid/s won’t appreciate it and that we’re not doing it for fun, but out of obligation. I wish I could just eat cereal every night haha.

Drinking: A lot of water lately. I’ve gone from never drinking enough to just needing to sip on it all day. I think it’s the need to fight off this cold.

Reading: Not enough. Online or offline! I have a whole list of awesome kick arse ladies’ autobiographies I need to get through. One day!

Wanting: Warm weather. Carpet for my home office. More family time.

Looking: For my lip balm (I can never keep one within my sight until it’s finished). I’ve enjoyed wearing a lot of matte lip colour, but it dries my lips out a lot!

Playing: Snapchat stories in my down time – with no interruptions – is very soothing.

Deciding: How to structure this Saturday. I wish I didn’t have to use the word ‘structure’ on a Saturday, but it’s necessary these days!

Wishing: My bleeding uterus would hurry up and be over with this. I have a life to live and I do not handle things like the girls in the tampon commercials!

Enjoying: Some quiet time before the Little Mister wakes up for the day.

Waiting: To get started on an exciting opportunity I have been given.

Liking: How well I’ve handled this last (unsuccessful) cycle of trying to conceive. It’s f*cking hard, but I stayed fairly strong this time. Which is hard to do at this point. I think the key has been filling my life with joy, finding inspiration in amazing places (and acting on it) and remembering my inner warrior/bad ass. The same things might not work next time, but this has been good. I could probably dedicate a whole blog post to this if I wanted.

Wondering: When our time will come. Or whether it will at all. Wondering what life will bring and how I will adjust to whatever happens.

Loving: The Little Mister. I am so grateful to have him. What a gift. I definitely do not take that for granted.

Pondering: Always.

Considering: What to write here. Ha!

Buying: Some last minute Father’s Day bits and pieces.

Watching: The Gilmore Girls, Arrested Development,  and Chelsea (as in Handler) on Netflix. 

Hoping: For a miracle.

Marvelling: At how many doors open when you close others. When you are so ready for new things to come your way in life, and then it’s like the universe responds to your shift in energy. I don’t want to be that bitch, but hashtag fucking blessed.

Cringing: At the memory of that awful accidental FaceTime call the other day…

Needing: Positive news about my fertility situation. Soon. I just want some kind of sign that everything might be OK and will work out. But I know that’s not how the universe necessarily works. Still, I’m keeping an eye/ear out ?

Questioning: My recent food choices. I have been so slack. I’ve been eating so many processed foods and carbs and all the stuff that makes me feel crappy. WHY????

Smelling: Not much with this nose!

Wearing: A long sleeved nightie that shrunk the first time I washed it and so now it’s really really short, but I still try to wear it anyway.

Following: The publishing of this blog post, I am going to have a really nice hot shower. Bliss.

Noticing: That the floor of my bedroom desperately needs to be vacuumed. Oops.

Knowing: Who I am and not being (too) afraid to stay true to that has been the biggest gift of my 30s. Deep but true.

Thinking: About how to dress for today’s weather. Which is really cold. Brrr.

Admiring: People who can keep their houses clean ALL the time.

Sorting: My emails has proven to be surprisingly calming when I’ve had anxiety. Two birds, one stone!

Getting: Out more socially lately has done wonders for my sanity.

Bookmarking: Facebook videos I never get around to watching, because they involve swear words or audio that I won’t be able to listen to when I first see them in my feed for whatever reason.

Coveting: ALL the spring fashion. I am impressed by it this year. Some years are not for me. This year feels like I can definitely work with it and look half decent. YES! Now for me to win the lotto, please?

Disliking: Paying the bills. This time of year is EXPENSIVE.

Opening: My fitbit app to see how well I’m doing (not great)! I’m loving the new ‘adventure’ challenges though.

Giggling: When I think about my latest secret squirrel exploits.

Feeling: Disappointed that I’m not pregnant, but ready to start anew.

Snacking: Has been out of control lately. I blame PMS and cold weather! But really, I could do better.

Helping: Myself to stay fit and healthy has been falling down the priority list lately. I’m hoping to change that very soon.

Hearing: The Wiggles babysitting the Little Mister. Thank you, Wiggles!

So, what have you been doing/feeling lately? Leave a comment!

Taking stock: July 2016 edition.

I’m sitting here on this rainy day, trying to get my brain working now that we’re home from an AMAZING trip to Melbourne. The reality of school holidays has dawned on me and I’m also realising that time is passing by so fast! I thought this would be a nice time to take stock

Currently…

Making: myself drink a glass of water. I think I’m a little dehydrated. Nothing new, really!

Cooking: Dinner tonight. Mr Unprepared has been awesome throughout the school term, covering my arse when it’s all seemed a bit hard, but I want to pitch in more! Tonight is the exotic sausage and veggies. Who knows which way I will cook it? A slow cooked stew? With pasta? Bangers and mash? The suspense!

Drinking: Water! I already told you that!

Reading: I’ve been scouring my Facebook newsfeed, looking for well written, shareable blog posts/articles. You can find that stuff on my new Facebook page, if you like. It’s like a pet side project.

Wanting: A child free day or two! I’ve loved my hang time with the Little Mister, but it has been intense! I’d love to just chill in the quiet for a bit! BUT…I don’t want to wish away the school holidays just yet either (hello – no lunches or early morning rushing)!

Looking: At my tidy house and wondering how long it will stay that way. The Little Mister is trying this new, revolutionary thing where he puts things away when he’s finished playing with them – without me having to beg him. I think the novelty will wear off soon – I think he’s in a honeymoon phase now we’re home.

Playing: Snapchat stories to kill time. Username: kezunprepared !!

Deciding: On how to structure my day. I’ve literally made no solid plans for any of the school holidays yet! How does that happen??

Wishing: That a phone call I’ve been waiting for will happen today. I am very sick of playing phone chasey with someone who should have called me first. Grrr.

Enjoying: The Little Mister’s random comments. He just ran up to me wearing a silly hat, saying “I am going to keep this on so people don’t know that I have hair.” OK… ?

Waiting: For that aforementioned phone call. The person in question has been made aware of my frustration and I have been promised a call back in the next couple of hours. Fingers crossed.

Liking: Twitter DM conversations with friends I can talk about anything with. Literally anything. Hashtag grateful.

Wondering: If I’ll cry today. I hope not. Bit stressed. (in)Fertility shit in case you’re wondering. Ha. Wondering. Let’s all wonder together.

Loving: My memories of Melbourne. So much cool shit happened. That trip away was just what the Little Mister and I needed (we were bummed Mr Unprepared couldn’t make it because of work).

Pondering: On what professionalism really means. Is it just fulfilling your job description or is it never forgetting to give a shit?

Considering: What healthy snacks to stock up on today, so the Little Mister doesn’t eat us out of house and home during the holidays!

Buying: New pillows. I have come back from my holiday and realised that my pillow situation just will not do! They’re too flat and they’ve lost their oomph. My sleep is precious, damn it!

Watching: Playschool. Under duress. 

Hoping: That 2016 can turn itself around for me.

Marvelling: At how a sick kid can still find so much energy.

Cringing: At the fact that I forgot about a wet load of the Little Mister’s washing in the machine last night and now I have to rewash it all so it doesn’t get stinky. And then I have to deal with the ‘husband washed a tissue in the previous load’ situation which is all over our dry clothes.

Needing: Some couch time.

Questioning: When to leave the house. Before or after that phone call I’m expecting? Will it rain on us when we go out?

Smelling: My perfume that my parents got me after my surgery. Still love it. It’s called Rhi Rhi or Ri Ri or whatever Rihanna called it. Love a good celebrity scent!

Wearing: Black, torn jeans and a polka dotted black tee shirt. And an air of I’ve run out of fucks and I haven’t done my washing since I got home from Melbourne.

Following: The latest election (can we even call it that) news with a bemused look on my face. So…who’s our prime minister? And how long will he last before he’s ousted? Oh, Australian politics. You suck.

Noticing: My dogs snuggling up together on the same bed because it’s cold. So cute.

Knowing: The day of the week is a bit of a struggle at the moment. I thought yesterday was Wednesday (it was) but then I forgot it was and thought today was Wednesday too. And then I remembered it was Thursday and that I must have missed Offspring last night which brings me to the next point…

Thinking: As much as I was really sad when the previous season of Offspring ended because it was my favourite show, I felt like they resolved it all so well and I was ready to let go when I’d had a few weeks to let it all sink in. Now that it’s back, I am really hoping it won’t lack the amazing everything that it had before.

Admiring: All the beautiful winter coats I saw people wearing in Melbourne and then remembering that I’d never wear them here, despite the Perth cold being quite Melbourne-ish this year.

Sorting: Out the contents of my suitcase. I am a lazy unpacker but I’m gonna nail this. I give myself until the weekend to have it all done.

Getting: More assertive, the older I get. This could either be a really good thing or a dangerous thing haha.

Bookmarking: Not much lately! I would love to sit down and explore some new stuff.

Coveting: A few more pairs of jeans, please. Preferably distressed, dark in colour and totally my size.

Disliking: The fact that my fitbit is charging and none of my steps have been counted today!

Opening: My heart. Yes. I went there. Cheesy AF. But it’s true. It’s a daily decision sometimes.

Giggling: feels good. I’d like to do more of it.

Feeling: Like I think I should just let some stuff wash over me instead of overthinking it. Trying to stay in the moment right now.

Snacking: On things that are not wholesome or healthy. OMG I need to get back on the veggie bandwagon. I mean, I feel like a big hypocrite because I wrote this post and then I went to Melbourne and got addicted to all sorts of things I wouldn’t normally feast on! Damn it! I promise to get back on track! One thing I did do well was drink green smoothies, at least?

Helping: is something the Little Mister tries to do all the time. I love his enthusiasm, even if the results can range from victorious/celebration worthy to OMG PLEASE DON’T DO THAT.

Hearing: The Little Mister doing something with crayons and paper and I should probably check on that…

So what have you been up to lately? Tell me, because I’m nosy!

Taking Stock: May 2016 Edition.

Every couple of months I write a ‘taking stock’ post, to capture where my life is at in that exact moment. Also, I have writer’s block. You know when your head is filled with ALL THE THINGS, but none of them want to spit themselves out into written form? Yeah, that.

Making: Cringey faces because the Little Mister has decided that his only volume today is 11. Out of 10.
Cooking: Not as much as I’d like to. I seem to have lost my cooking mojo. I miss feeling all inspired and spending too much time in the kitchen. It would be really helpful if I could, because the Little Mister’s lunchbox would be filled with much cheaper, healthier things if I could get my arse in gear.
Drinking: Water.
Reading: TV Week magazine. Because it’s all my brain can take. It’s my guilty pleasure.
Wanting: To feel 100% healthy. My body has been giving me a bit of grief lately.
Looking: At my computer. Because I’m typing. Duh.
Playing: Play School. Because it buys me a moment of peace.
Deciding: On what groceries to ask my husband to buy so I don’t have to go to the supermarket today. That way we can survive just one more day. Procrastination at its best.
Wishing: Everyone a wonderful Mother’s Day filled with love this weekend.
Enjoying: Spotify. I am quite late to this music streaming party, but gosh it’s great. I can play music for any mood. Helps me get through the day!
Waiting: For the Little Mister’s new lunchbox to arrive. It’s Bento style and gorgeous and little-hands proof and it’s coming tomorrow (according to Aus Post)! I am going to be so excited to make his lunches. Or at least that’s the plan. Any motivation is good.
Liking: My comfy winter clothes. Hoodies and PJs galore! I am not the biggest fan of winter (mostly because I get Vitamin D deficient and glum) but I have enjoyed the novelty of wearing snuggly clothes and curling up on the couch.
Wondering: How long is too long to grow my fingernails. I mean, it’s getting harder to activate my snapchat filters (priorities), but they do look pretty.
Loving: Myself. Trying to be kind to myself because my body has been letting me down a bit, but I am looking after myself and treating myself a bit and just trying to be positive.
Considering: Turning off all screens for a while once I finish this blog post. I am not militant about screen time, but I do feel good when we cut down.
Buying: New shoes. Soon. It’s an expense that annoys me, but I have sadly identified a very real gap in my wardrobe. I have no casual, closed in, flat shoes. I can’t wear sandals all winter. I just can’t. And my booties don’t go with everything. So you see my dilemma.
Watching: The Mother’s Day movie this week with my mums’ group. I am a sucker for that sentimental, ensemble cast crap. 
Hoping: The Little Mister does well in swimming lessons this afternoon. He’s a bit of a mixed bag depending on his confidence or attention span.
Marvelling: at how long the sleeves are on my new comfy, slouchy jumper. WHO HAS ARMS THAT LONG?
Cringing: Whenever I think of my Friday night vom in front of the girls. It wasn’t my fault at all (I was not drunk and the bathroom was far away and I had very little warning that my body was staging a revolt against me trying to get out and have a life), but SO embarrassing.
Needing: A date night with Mr Unprepared. It’s been too long.
Questioning: My judgement when I dress in activewear and then do nothing active. I swore I would never be that person. I SWORE.
Smelling: My freshly washed hair.
Wearing: A jumper (the one with the super long sleeves) that says ‘Pardon my French’ but it says it in French. Super classy, y’all. Gym pants. In my defence, they’re brand new and I wanted to try them on anyway ?
Following: Just about everyone associated with the Kardashian brand on Snapchat. And I’m not even sorry. This is what my life has become. Watching rich people staring into space while lip synching to rap songs and showing off how rich they are.
Noticing: That the Little Mister is being really quiet. YES.
Knowing: Who has got your back when times are a bit rocky is comforting.
Thinking: About the housework I have to do.
Admiring: People who say it how it is.
Sorting: Nothing.
Getting: My arse kicked on the work week hustle fitbit challenge by my friend Alice.
Bookmarking: Funny Facebook posts that make me laugh.
Coveting: ALL OF THE MATTE LIPSTICKS EVER.
Disliking: How little I get done when I am not feeling my best.
Opening: Online shopping packages is the best. It’s like a present from your past, more rich self to your now poor self.
Giggling: Is fun. Having friends who make you giggle is priceless.
Feeling: OKish. I am really hoping that today I make some headway in feeling up to being a human being.
Snacking: A little less (I hope). I am doing an 8 week body challenge with my friends. We’re basically working on our personal goals and helping to motivate each other. Will let you know how it goes.
Helping: Always. Ha.
Hearing: Myself yawning.

Let me know if you take stock too! x

Taking Stock: March 2016

So I’ve decided  that it’s a good time to ‘take stock’ again. I do like the idea of capturing a snapshot of where I’m at throughout the year.

Here’s what I’m currently…

Making : No real plans for the weekend. I mean, I’ll be open to spontaneous fun if the opportunities arise, but I am really enjoying the fact that it’s a long weekend and there is currently nothing super important on our plate. Nothing we HAVE to do. Everything will be on our terms. That’s kind of lovely.
Cooking : I hope I will be at some point. I do like to get my ‘bake’ on. That sounds drug related, but no. I am just addicted to thinking about food. The cupboard might get a little bare as we streeeeetch to pay day, but I think/hope I can create some interesting things.
Drinking : I’ve been enjoying cider lately. I’d like to rediscover wine. But to be honest, not a lot of drinking has been going on lately – a good thing. I am trying to drink more water. My skin is dry and I need the feeling of cleansing my body.
Reading: No books at the moment (unless you count the Little Mister’s bedtime stories). But I have been trying to chip away at my favourite blogs. I have SO much catching up to do!
Wanting: To feel peaceful. I’ve felt fairly good in the past couple of days, but I have certainly been tested mentally and emotionally lately. I’m working on it!
Looking: At the soft light coming through the blinds as the sun rises. I’m kind of excited that it’s autumn. While I’m a summer girl, I think autumn is my favourite season.
Playing: With my Periscope app. I’ve been broadcasting for about 5 minutes a day. It’s not the most scintillating stuff but I’m having fun building my confidence at being recorded and talking to a camera. It’s also nice to document my life day by day (even if the broadcasts delete themselves after 24 hours). You can watch me embarrass myself if you like (you can access it on my Twitter timeline or on the app). Then 2 people might be watching haha.
Deciding: To be positive. To try not to dwell on the things I don’t have and remember the things I do have.
Wishing: That my dreams for my family come true.
Enjoying: Just sitting here. Being still.
Waiting: For Mr Unprepared to get home from his early morning bike ride. He has promised to look after the Little Mister this morning when he wakes – yay.
Liking: The quiet.
Wondering: If I’ll ever figure out what to watch next on Netflix. I keep thinking, “Nope. Can’t watch that – must wait for Mr Unprepared.” or I just can’t make up my mind because I think I have to be in the perfect mood for the perfect show/movie. This makes me sound like I have too much time on my hands, but quite honestly I don’t (I think it’s the pressure of having to optimise my viewing time), so you can see why this is a problem haha.
Loving: My friends. They’re so supportive and it’s nice. I used to not let myself be vulnerable or show when I wasn’t OK. I was missing out. They are more than fair-weather friends and I am so grateful.
Pondering: On where life will take me. Like, what’s the grand plan?
Considering: Overhauling the Little Mister’s old nursery. Making it into a pretty spare room. Oops. Haven’t told Mr Unprepared about that one yet haha. Look, it’s optimistic. I haven’t even made much headway on my home office reno yet. One step at a time!
Buying: Something I can’t go public with yet because I want to surprise someone and I don’t know if they read this blog. Ooh!
Watching: Trophy Kids doco on Netflix made me angry last night. The parents on there were horrible. There I said it. The way they pushed their children so hard to excel in various sports, literally pretending it was God’s plan when it was really their own agenda, made me feel horrible inside. THEY’RE CHILDREN. I am not usually one to judge other people’s parenting decisions, but I admit this one made me feel icky. 
Hoping:
Everything works out. 
Marvelling: At how I’ve managed to survive the week and the Little Mister doesn’t have to go back to kindy for aaaaages thanks to the long weekend – less drop offs and pick ups – yay!
Cringing: At Donald Trump. Need I say more. 
Needing: Self care. 
Questioning: What the hell it is I’m supposed to learn from secondary infertility. Because I believe everything happens for a reason, but I admit I’m struggling to know what the hell that reason could possibly be. Trying not to dwell on those ‘it’s not fair’ thoughts.
Smelling: My morning breath probably!
Wearing: My nightie. Because typing in bed. Winning.
Following: the posting of this blog post, I might try to go back to sleep!
Noticing: That Mr Unprepared is home and he’s always noisy!
Knowing: I’m going to be OK. I’m stronger than I often give myself credit for.
Thinking: is overrated.
Admiring: People who don’t give a fuck about what other people think. In a good way.
Sorting: My home office out. Painfully slowly. 
Getting: Sleepy again. That tends to happen by about 6:30am when I’m woken at 4:30am (happens quite regularly around here).
Bookmarking: Stuff on Facebook I never get around to reading/watching! I only just started using the ‘save this link’ function thingy. It’s good for when you don’t have time to read something but you don’t want to lose it in your feed.
Coveting: Liquid lipstick and new lip liners. There’s something about nice lippie to warm up an autumn/winter look, so that’s my goal. Nice lip stuff for the winter.
Disliking: People who are dicks. Because duh.
Opening: My heart. Because sometimes it can be tempting to shut everything down when times are hard, but I don’t want to do that.
Giggling: At Ross Noble (a hilarious comedian) the other night was just what I needed!
Feeling: Calm. This is good.
Snacking: On everything I can get my hands on because PMS.
Helping: All the time. Because mum. Wife.
Hearing: Crows making their crow noises (‘crowing’??) outside.

So…what are you doing right now? Besides reading my blog (thank you!)? x

Taking Stock: New Year’s Eve 2015

I’ve decided it’s time to take stock again (I seem to do it every couple of months). It’s been that funny time smack bang between Christmas and the New Year, where everything feels floaty and strange (but pretty nice and relaxed) and we keep forgetting what day of the week it is and we ask ourselves where we’re at and where we want to be going. It feels appropriate to record these moments, only hours before ringing in 2016.

Better jump in…

Making : A mental to-do list of things to pack for tonight’s picnic. We’re going to have a simple, low key celebration with friends near the beach.
Cooking : Mini quiches (pre-made because I do not have time for ‘from scratch’!). I’ve got all the other nibbles ready, but I figure it can’t hurt to flesh them out a bit with some ‘party’ food the Little Mister (and maybe our friends’ daughters) will like.
Drinking : Water mostly. I’ve been trying to increase my uptake lately. As for booze, I think I’ll mostly pass. After last weekend’s child free efforts, I am still in that whole “I never want to see a mojito again” phase. I know I don’t really mean it because hello, mojitos, but seriously – let’s just say I need a break haha.
Reading: More blogs. I’ve enjoyed being home a little more, having some more time and energy to spend on my laptop reading. In the past month I’ve either been too busy to sit still and just enjoy my favourite blogs or I’ve been too tired to do anything but Netflix and Coma (it’s totally a thing).
Wanting: 2016 to be kind to me. There’s one big dream I have and if it becomes a reality any time during the year, that will be more than enough to be grateful for. 2015 wasn’t kind in that area, nor 2014, so maybe 2016 will be our year.
Looking: Bloated. Thanks Christmas and PMS! Thanks a fucking bunch!
Playing: With the Little Mister has been fun the past few days. I’ve been able to slow down and enjoy it with him. I’ve secretly liked having him around more now that he’s on a break from day care before he starts kindy next February.
Deciding: What attitude to have today. A part of me wants to be all pissed off and sad about some stuff, but another part of me needs to rally and be positive and enjoy making memories for the Little Mister. Really, it’s a no brainer. Just gotta dig a little deeper.
Wishing: For the same things I’ve been wishing for the past year and a half.
Enjoying: The silence before the Little Mister gets out of bed.
Waiting: To finish this blog post because the Little Mister is getting out of bed haha

And I’m back!

Liking: The way the Little Mister has been playing so independently lately. It’s freed me up to get more stuff done, after he went through a long clingy phase whenever we were home (maybe due to wanting more time with me after spending half the week at day care/being an only child – which I always feel guilty about?)
Wondering: What the future holds. I know that’s vague, but it’s New Year’s Eve after all. So many possibilities ahead.
Loving: Early nights with Netflix (yes – I still love Netflix since the last time I mentioned it a few sentences ago). Perfect summer viewing when there’s nothing good on TV.
Pondering: The difference between ‘wondering’ and ‘pondering’?
Considering: The availability of toilet/bathroom access while we’re picnicking tonight. Not just for the Little Mister, but annoyingly for myself at ‘that time of the month’. Isn’t that stuff just so inconvenient to deal with? Ugh.
Buying: Some new bathers soon. I am excited because I got a voucher to a really nice store for Christmas. I’m looking forward to allowing myself to feel nice when I’m on the beach this summer. Just because my body isn’t what it was BC (Before Child) doesn’t mean I don’t deserve to enjoy shopping for nice swimwear and feeling some pride. It’s the one area I’ve not quite nailed when it comes to loving/accepting my body as it is.
Watching: ABC Kids. Well, the Little Mister is. Going to let him take it easy with a little more screen time today, so he has a bit more energy to stay up later tonight. 
Hoping: The Little Mister has enough staying power to watch the ‘family friendly’ NYE fireworks that are being put on at 9pm tonight. It’s a late night for him, so we’ll see!
Marvelling: At how life/the universe/powers to be have a weird plan for everybody. I think we can try to control our destiny as best we can and work to place ourselves where we feel we should be, but then it’s like the universe takes over and says, “Actually – this might not be what you want, but it’s what you need and the reasons won’t be clear until later.”
Cringing: Nope. Not cringing. Just resting bitch face.
Needing: To find the super cute diary I bought for 2016, which I’ve forgotten about until now!
Questioning: A couple of things. Ooh. Vague. Don’t you hate me?
Smelling: Nothing offensive. Which is always a relief haha.
Wearing: A green T-shirt dress that I hang about the house in. It will do until I get dressed for tonight.
Following: As many fun people on snapchat as possible. Add me! What’s your username? Mine’s kezunprepared 😉
Noticing: That since we got our new (second hand but good as new) couch, less crap accumulates under it. This is because it has higher legs than our old one and the Little Mister can reach his toys and shoes when they roll under there. Yay.
Knowing: I’m in this magical limbo time when nothing administrative matters for another few days. No ‘important’ things to remember, phone calls to make, quotes to get etc. It’s awesome!
Thinking: More like OVERthinking. Have you met me??
Admiring: How long I’ve been able to grow my nails. I thought that by now they’d have all broken.
Sorting: The Little Mister’s toys out. Very slowly and cautiously. We need to make room for his newer stuff and declutter, but he just loves EVERY SINGLE THING.
Getting: Older. Haha.
Bookmarking: Not much lately. Or at least nothing that comes to mind.
Coveting: Not much right now. I cleaned up nicely at Christmas and I am very grateful!
Disliking: Waiting.
Opening: My mouth. To drink some water.
Giggling: Not yet, but I am sure that the Little Mister will set me off later with his hilarious antics.
Feeling: Happy to bring in a new year. I’m ready. Bring it.
Snacking: Not as much as I could have at this time of year, thank goodness.
Helping: Always 😉
Hearing: The TV and the clattering of the Little Mister trying to ‘build’ something in his play room. Which makes me wonder why the TV is still on…

So that’s it. That’s where I’m at. For better and for worse. I’ve had a good year. The tough stuff really upset me at times, but the good stuff was great. Y’know? Like any year, 2015 has had its challenges but I’ve learned a lot and I’ve grown. Overall, I look back on the year and it’s been full of more good times than bad. That’s a win in my book.

I really hope that you have a wonderful 2016. You’re awesome x