Tag: milestones

Back to School anxiety: mine, not his.

It’s January. That time when it sinks in that the school holidays are not as long as you thought they were and you feel that downward slide back to reality. Another school year, filled with trying to remember stuff and being on time for drop offs and pick ups and SO MANY LUNCHES to be made.

I am looking forward to the Little Mister attending pre-primary full time. I imagine the first few weeks will be full of exhausted after school meltdowns, but I am excited to be able to spread my work hours out over the week more evenly and feel a lot more productive.

The thing is, I get anxious. Anxious that he will fit in and do OK compared to the other kids. Anxious that he’ll be anxious. Anxious that I will forget a whole lot of stuff or be totally awkward in the lead up to the first day back – book lists and the dreaded uniform shop visits (I swear I can never remember what hours or days they’re open).

I know it won’t be as bad as last year. Last year I was a wreck. The Little Mister was starting kindy at the same place I went to high school. I was having all kinds of flashbacks to my time there (nothing horrendous or obviously we wouldn’t send him there – just freak outs because I felt like I was still the student trying to be on my best behaviour and not get in trouble haha). I had never sent a kid to school before. I felt like I was still a kid. How was this happening?! Sure, we’d done day care a couple of days a week in 2015, but this was a big deal!

I had missed an orientation day because I screwed up the dates (and then my husband had unexpected surgery on his toe which would have meant we couldn’t make it anyway). I’d had a couple of false starts trying to get to the uniform shop (see – I messed up their opening hours then too haha). I hadn’t submitted my online booklist order on time, so had to send Mr Unprepared out to scramble for each individual item (which made me nervous because obviously if we got the wrong stuff we’d be outcasts forever haha). I was also feeling like a hot mess for a variety of reasons that had nothing to do with the the Little Mister’s schooling. I was not on top of things. I really was not. Even reading this paragraph back tells me that I was not in the running for “Mum of the Year”.

This year, I feel a little more settled. I know the school. I know the Little Mister has come a long way since the beginning of 2016. I’ve met a bunch of really nice school mums and I know I will meet a whole bunch more. I’ve got my shit sorted on a nice calendar now, which I keep updated. I have planned the final weeks of the school holidays so that I have everything done in time.

But still, I feel nervous. Of course I don’t show the Little Mister this and I really hope he can’t tell. He gets nervous enough on his own, truth be told.

I feel bummed that it’s not all holiday fun and games right now in my head anymore (even though that kid is driving me up the wall and ultimately I will be grateful to have dropped him off that first day haha).

I feel silly for being nervous and I feel like I’m wasting these precious last weeks worrying about school stuff when there’s still fun to be had. I’ve really got to get over myself! Just tick something off the list and then go have a blast, Kez. Seriously, woman!

Just like last year, we will survive this one too. I was struggling to get my head around a whole lot of stuff in 2016 (finally beginning treatment for infertility for one and in all honesty grief – grief that my little boy was starting school already and had no siblings that I’d always hoped to give him by the time he started kindy) and I think I should be kind to myself. It was a rough and scary year from beginning to end.

2017 may or may not be any better, but at least I will kind of know what to expect (probably jinxing myself right there).

Awesomely a little less unprepared, maybe?

Maybe one day, my heart won’t leap up into my throat when my child starts a new school year. Please tell me this gets easier! Lie to me if you have to!

Does anyone else get nervous like me? Am I …normal? Or a silly freak? 

 

What is this? A handbag for ants?

When the Little Mister was born, my handbag situation got ridiculous. Every day, a trip to the shops was like moving houses. An overnight stay somewhere took the same preparation time as that of a month long overseas holiday. There was a pram, nappy bag, my handbag…actually, scratch that. For a while, my nappy bag was also my handbag. Because babies don’t give a damn about style. They just need bottles, wipes, mashed up baby food goo, nappies, nappy rash cream, spare outfits (because poop tsunamis), teething toys, bibs blah blah. You name it, I had it in my bag. I was awesomely over-prepared (yet it never felt like it).

When the Little Mister reached toddlerhood, I managed to get away with carrying just one massive handbag (it was a way of fooling myself into thinking that nobody would be able to tell it was a total ‘mum’ bag – not sure it fooled anyone). That habit has truly stuck. I win all of those silly baby shower/kitchen tea party games – you know the ones where you get points for every ridiculous thing you find in your handbag? Yep. I am a freakin’ champ. I will come to your baby shower and fuck shit up. Woo. Last time I won, it was because I had a toy Hot Wheels car and an odd sock in there.

I am that uncoordinated jerk filling up the aisles on aeroplanes with my massive jerk bag. I am the idiot who bangs her handbag into people at the shops. Mostly accidentally of course. In my defence, some people just walk right into it. I guess they just can’t handle someone with that much swag bag. I am always being told, “WATCH OUT” by the people I’m with, because if anyone’s going to turn around suddenly, swiping several fragile things off a shop shelf…I’m your guy.

(PS Kate Hill does some awesome ones if you’re in that awkward toddler phase BTW – you’re welcome – you too can be a jerk with a big jerk bag but it will be a pretty jerk bag)

So anyhoo…with the Little Mister starting kindy this month, I thought I deserved a little treat. Key word: little. Because now I’m going to spend more days getting out and about without him than with him – which is a little bit bittersweet if you ask me but let’s move on without being a sentimental fool for once, Kez – that means I don’t have to carry so much crap. YESSSSS.

I found this beauty. She was on sale ($30 WHAT?!). She was much smaller than the big arsed bag I’ve been lugging about. She was a pretty colour. She had zips and pockets in all the right places.

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Yep. People have ‘first day of school’ photos. I have a photo to commemorate my first smallish handbag. OK, so maybe I have a ton of first day of school photos too, but shhhhh. I’m having a moment.

I feel like this milestone is completely underrated.

I took my new bag with me to school drop off and the shops today. It was fantastic. It tucked so nicely under my arm. My shoulder didn’t want to dislocate itself from the weight. Sure, it will take some getting used to. I mean, it’s really weird being able to find stuff in there right away. And it does feel like a little handbag for tiny ants.

I feel like someone’s going to yell out, “OH LOOK. WHAT’S WITH THAT LADY’S TEENSY TINY HANDBAG. IT LOOKS LIKE A DOLL’S HANDBAG. THAT HANDBAG IS TOO SMALL FOR HUMANS.”

But the truth is, it’s really just a normal sized handbag. You know? The type that normal women use every day without incident?

It’s liberating. Let me illustrate how it feels, with the use of a Nicolas Cage gif.

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So tell me.

How big is your handbag? What’s the weirdest thing in it, right now

The Happy List #22 – Little Mister’s 4th birthday edition.

Wow, I almost forgot to write a happy list for this week! It’s been a big one as we’ve celebrated the Little Mister’s fourth birthday! He didn’t have a birthday party this year and as family and friends have been all over the place, we’ve simply decided to celebrate his birthday over and over in smaller ways, the lucky thing.

Here are the things that made me happy this week (in no particular order)…

Surprising the Little Mister with a trip to AQWA (the Aquarium of WA)

We wanted to do something special with the Little Mister (in lieu of a birthday party) that he would remember, so the day after his birthday, we decided to surprise him with a trip to the aquarium. It’s a bit of a trek from our place and something different. We didn’t tell him that his uncle, aunty and cousin were coming – he knew nothing! He asked where we were going a few times on the drive there, but he just seemed happy to be along for the ride.

When we got there, he was so happy he was wriggling with joy to see his uncle and aunty. Then we got in the doors to pay to get in and he was all, “WOW! WHAT IS THIS PLACE?!” with so much wonder and joy in his voice. He has been to an aquarium before (in Korea) but he had never been to AQWA and we knew it would be the last thing he’d be expecting.

He loved the experience (almost as much as he loved the conveyor belt thingy that takes you around underwater) and he forgot his indoor voice a few times!

Afterwards, we went for burgers and ice cream. It was honestly the most lovely day and I was so glad we got to give it to him.

He slept all the way home in the car!

The love everyone has shown the Little Mister for his birthday

We are so appreciative of all the messages, Face Time sessions (from those who can’t be close by), gifts and hugs that the Little Mister has received this year. He’s a very lucky and loved little guy.

He got to see his grandparents (my inlaws) for Friday Fajitas (our little tradition) and cupcakes on his birthday and he got to spend quality time with his great grandparents too. Not to mention AQWA. He’ll see my parents next weekend when they are home from one of my dad’s work trips. Um hello – birthday WEEK!

Barbecued corn – seriously. Makes me happy.

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I’m not kidding. I live for it. Even when it’s cold in the fridge the next day, I do not care. YUM.

Trying to get two massive bunches of helium balloons from the shops into the car

I was prepping to surprise the Little Mister on his birthday morning with a bunch of green/dinosaur themed balloons. He had asked for balloons for his birthday a little while back. I kind of went all out because I knew he wasn’t getting his gifts until later in the day when Mr Unprepared got home from work. Turns out, it’s more embarrassing than you think to get helium balloons from the inside of a busy shopping centre to the car. I had them in a trolley and I couldn’t see where I was going and little kids everywhere were enchanted and it was bloody hilarious. I looked like a freakin’ idiot. Even better when the breeze kicked in just as I got to the car! I’ve never laughed at myself so much (actually I probably have – have you met me?).

Betty Crocker (not sponsored haha)

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I do love baking a cake (or 12) from scratch, but sometimes it just needs to be easy and no-one ever notices the difference anyway. I just used some dinosaur sprinkles, some green food colouring for the pre-made Betty Crocker tub of frosting, my own patty cases, a piping bag (you can get these awesome disposable ones) and Bob’s your uncle! The Little Mister was quite pleased 🙂

Betty has been saving my arse for a while – she’s my secret weapon!

Other stuff that’s made me happy this week…

  • Having visitors meant I had to kick myself up the bum and clean everything. My house is nice… for now haha.
  • The fact that I am sitting down to write this. So nice to take a breath!
  • Reading about Bruce’s (of Big Family Little Income) wife Tracey having a fart in hospital (I know that sounds really out of context if you haven’t been following but trust me it’s wonderful news). This isn’t just good news for their gorgeous family, but for me because I can now tell my husband he should not take it for granted (and in fact should be grateful) when I let it rip while we watch TV in the evening 😉
  • The Little Mister putting me to bed when I said I was tired. I had to lie down, have a blanket put over me and I was given a cuddle toy. He then ran out of the room. Which then worried me and I thought I’d better find him haha. But still, it was quite sweet I think!
  • Knowing there are some fun things ahead this month AND THEN IT’S DECEMBER WHEN I LET MYSELF GET EXCITED ABOUT CHRISTMAS!

What’s on your happy list this week? 

Four.

 

Dear Little Mister,

I can’t believe you’re four today. FOUR. That’s such a big number. I’ve always thought of FOUR as a pretty big deal. I mean, that’s pretty grown up. You’re like a fully fledged KID now. Not a baby. Not a toddler. A KID.

A kid who loves the colour green and is starting to become interested in dinosaurs. A kid who is incredibly caring, bossy, affectionate, creative, inquisitive and NOISY.

Right now, you swear that you do not like chicken. At all. You think chicken is just so not an option. Unless you’re eating chicken nuggets. I mean, duh.

When my mum is on holiday, you ask Siri to search for Nanna (like you literally want to find her). You think everyone can see you when you’re talking on the phone so you try to show people things around the house and they have no idea what’s going on. You still call my iPad an OurPad because I share it with you when you’re being good. It makes sense to you, I guess! Nice try, buddy haha.

You’re the biggest dibber dobber on the planet. You call Daddy out when he’s sneaking chocolate from the top shelf of the fridge (where we keep the good stuff). Nothing gets by you. NOTHING. I think I only JUST got by with hiding your birthday presents this year. Santa is going to have to be really really clever this time around, I think.

You’re always singing. Whether it’s a song you learnt at school, something that’s popular at the moment, or something you’ve made up. You literally wake up singing some days. I hope that’s a sign of a really happy kid. Some of my own happiest moments are the times you burst out into song when we are least expecting it. It’s still freakin’ adorable when you mix the lyrics up. I COULD JUST EAT YOU. Well, figuratively speaking.

Can I just say that I am very proud of the toilet training progress you’ve made in the past year? It was a big milestone (for me) when you started to go to the toilet on your own. So much of my day is freed up now (no joke) and I love how grown up you feel when you can take care of it all! We still have to remind you to work on your aim sometimes, but hey, things are going pretty well! I remember being so scared before you started toilet training. I think almost every parent gets worried their kid might still be in nappies by high school at some point. It’s so awesome to see how far you’ve come. I love that you can dress yourself and that you pick your own outfits. Yesterday’s Hawaiian shirt was something to behold.

You’re cheeky and you have the best sense of humour. Your comedic timing is spot on. You’re such a natural performer. I can see we’re going to have to find ways to channel that energy as you get older!

You start 4 year old kindy at the ‘big’ school in a few months. I can’t believe it. It’s so bittersweet for me! You’re growing up so fast! I want you to know that I don’t just love you but I really really like you. Even when you’re losing the plot and the house is a ball of noise and everybody is tired, we get by and we learn some lessons together. There are always some more laughs to be had, soon enough. I hope I’m a good teacher, because I’ll tell you this – I’m learning all the time too.

I hope that the year ahead is full of brand new, wonderful memories.

Lots of love,

Mummy.

The Happy List #10

The Happy List#10

 

It’s that time of the week again! Yep, the time when I get to list the things that made me happy this past week – a reminder to appreciate the little things. It also gets me in a positive frame of mind before starting a new week. Here goes…

Beautiful weather

This is definitely at the top of my list. Yesterday, we had an uncharacteristically beautiful winter’s day. We’re not just talking sunshine. We’re talking 24 degrees (Celsius), no cold bite to the breeze and summer vibes. Blue skies. A buzz in the air, like it was making everyone collectively happy. Oh, I wish I could have bottled it. If every day of the year was like yesterday, I would be a very happy person. It was the perfect interruption to the winter blues for me, personally, and just the boost I needed. Apparently, we’ve been forecast for showers for the rest of the week, but I shall remember yesterday and hold it close to my heart for the rest of the winter!

We did some gardening and we even got to eat a light, nibbly dinner al fresco! I had chilled out Triple J tunes cranking into the backyard all afternoon (at a respectful volume of course) and we could hear the neighbours’ kids playing too. It really was a taste of summer.

Feeling productive at work

Sometimes I just need to exercise the non mum part of my brain. This past week I got a lot done at work and it made me feel really good, like I’ve still got it.

A week without illness

Our household had a week and a half of illness free bliss. I am hoping to continue this, but realistically, I am sure this isn’t the last we’ve seen of the winter bugs. It was wonderful. The Little Mister made it to day care every single day (he goes twice a week), which meant I was able to put in some good hours at work and run around alone getting things done. That hasn’t happened in ages! It was a blissfully average week. It was also a relief that when the weekend’s original social plans were sadly cancelled, it wasn’t us who had to pull the plug for once (we hope our friends feel better soon)!

The Little Mister swimming like a superstar

The Little Mister goes to swimming lessons each week and while it can seem quite tedious for us parents, we always make sure we’re there (provided the Little Mister isn’t sick). He’s a little uncoordinated at times (poor kid gets it from me), but he plugs away at it and when we see some progress, we feel so excited and happy for him. The past couple of weeks we saw such a leap in his confidence. He was able to float on his back unassisted for a little while (something he’d been scared of before – hated having his ears in the water) and then this week, he took a leap and was able to ‘swim’ to his teacher a couple of metres away. It was sort of a half submerged torpedo attempt, but he didn’t sink and he tried really really hard. I’ve never been prouder. He is going up to the next level this coming week! The staff at the swimming centre were so supportive and made a big fuss of him – so cute.

There’s nothing like seeing your child feeling really proud of themselves when they’ve worked hard for something. He was on a high all evening – even called all his grandparents to share the news. Nawwww.

One of my BFFs arriving in town

It’s only a short stay before she has to head back to the US (where she lives with her lovely husband) for a few months, but knowing she’s on home soil is just wonderful. We’re going to catch up soon – I’ve missed her SO much! You know the mates who you see after a huge break, but it doesn’t matter that you were apart, because you can just pick up where you left off? She’s one of those precious gems. We’ve been making our home soil catch ups a priority since forever – I’ll always have time for her. So much love!

Other happy stuff…

  • Mr Unprepared securing a great temporary promotion. It is kind of an extended hiatus from his current position, which will give him so much great experience. He had to apply and interview for it, so I’m proud of him for giving it a go and being successful!
  • Brooklyn Nine Nine on Netflix (don’t judge me). Finishing Orange is the New Black.
  • Buying a dress in a size 10 (I’m usually a 12 these days). Sure, the sizing at that particular store can be a tad generous, but it was still a win because there have been tough times where even fitting into a size 12 (and still feeling good about it) has been stressful. I might be struggling at a weight plateau right now, but to see where I’ve toned up is just so encouraging and motivating. Must keep going and push harder with my exercise (and better eating – the tough part).
  • I borrowed my mum’s document shredder so I could get rid of old letters and bills (and anything with our private details printed on it) that we are no longer required to keep. The sound it makes as it eats all those annoying pieces of paper that have been cluttering up our home is just music to my ears! I could shred documents all day! In all seriousness, it’s great because I think those pieces of paper were just kept around because it was too time consuming to destroy our identifying information by hand. With this great decluttering tool, I have been motivated to do so much more to work towards my dream of a lady blogging cave.
  • Baking.

 

What would you put on your happy list this week?

 

The Happy List #9

The Happy List#9

 

The time has come to think about the stuff that made me happy in the past week. Things are getting slightly better around here. I had a week where I fought off my old frenemy anxiety (haaaave you met Patrice?), but I think I’m starting to come out the other side. The Little Mister hasn’t been sick all week (probably jinxing it yet again but what the hell). It’s August. I’m starting to see light at the end of this wintery tunnel.

A Saturday sleep in

This never happens. In fact, I technically didn’t sleep in, but I love having the ability to get up on my own terms while Mr Unprepared tends to the Little Mister. This has hardly ever happened in the past few months because of his full on cycling habit (and training for an upcoming charity ride). It’s nice and it’s peaceful. And I’m using it to blog haha.

My mum’s birthday

On Thursday, my mum turned *cough probably shouldn’t tell you cough*. It was lovely to go to lunch with her, my brother and dad even popped in on his lunch break from work. It was like old times! I had the yummiest Japanese style tempura and panko crumbed prawns. Still not the authentic ramen I’ve been missing since we went away last year, but pretty great!

We’re going to my parents’ today. My grandparents and uncle will be there. I love extended family catch ups. There’s not many of us but it’s a lovely close knit group. I made my mum a lemon meringue pie for sweets (my first ever attempt) and I cannot wait to cut into that bad boy and see if I got it right! My mum doesn’t know what I made yet and has been very clear about wanting it to be a surprise. I’m hoping she doesn’t read my blog until afterwards haha.

Sneak peek (it’s not as pretty as I thought it would be – bit too brown – but nothing seemed to go horribly wrong so that’s a win!)…

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Rain on the tin roof at night While I am completely and utterly over winter, there’s one thing I can still enjoy about it. I love the sound of it on our tin roof. When we first moved in, I thought it was SO LOUD because I’d always lived in houses with tiled roofs (I totally googled the plural of roof and I am told the modern version is roofs so glad I cleared that up). Now I love it. Must be like a peaceful white noise type thing. As long as I am inside, all voluntarily snuggled up when it happens, it is just lovely.

The Little Mister falling asleep on the couch You don’t understand. All his life, he’s never been the ‘spontaneous fall asleep anywhere’ kind of baby/kid. It would only ever happen if I’d rocked him or he’d been in the car or something. I’d seen all those pictures on Facebook of children falling asleep into their dinner or in the middle of doing something cute and thought, nawwww – that’s so adorable! Why doesn’t the Little Mister do that? Where’s the off switch? Well, this week I got my wish. Sure, it was 4pm but it was just beautiful. He was snoring like a tractor, with a drool puddle on the couch cushion the size of his head, but it made me so happy. Also, he’d been reeeeally annoying just moments earlier, so the quiet was nice haha.

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Running 1km without stopping While I admit that I haven’t really been on the treadmill as much as I could have this week, I was pretty excited to reach a new little milestone a few days ago. I can now run 1km without stopping (at 8km an hour for those playing at home). That’s like 1/5 of my goal to run 5km by the end of the year! Yay! I just hope I can keep it up! Still counting down until I can get out and about – I think it wouldn’t seem like such a slog if I was in the real world, looking at real scenery.

Other happy stuff…

  • The Little Mister sassing me when I was prepping the ingredients for the lemon meringue pie. I was taking a while and he looked at me and said, “You’re not making Nanna a cake – you’re just mucking around!” I couldn’t keep a straight face. Smart arse.
  • Cuddles on the couch with the Little Mister last night. We watched Marley and Me (until the sad part when the DVR conveniently cut out).
  • The Little Mister being well enough to attend day care 2 times out of 2 this week! A winter miracle! I even got to go to work!
  • Getting my little pay packet right when things were getting squeezy – what a relief.
  • Watching the Little Mister achieve new things in swimming lessons last night. What a little star.
  • My nail polish took over a week to chip.
  • I ordered Mr Unprepared’s birthday present 🙂
  • A few days of sunshine – much needed!

What would you put on your happy list right now?

I’ve moved…kind of.

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Hey, everybody. It’s been quite the week for this little old blog here. Guess what?!

We’re self hosted now, y’all. If you have no idea what I’m on about, don’t worry. That kind of makes two of us. Trust me. I have learnt some things this week, I tell ya.

Basically, it means this space is all mine now. ALL MINE. Mu ha ha. Who knows what further mischief I can get up to now?

I hope it’s not too much trouble to ask you all to make sure that you are subscribing to…

http://awesomelyunprepared.com 

and that the links you have for me are all up to date!

Wouldn’t want you to miss anything (I’m sort of secretly scared I’ll somehow screw this up and all of my lovely people will disappear)!

Because you really are lovely people. And I truly am feeling awesomely unprepared now haha.

I’ll be tinkering away for a little while before I really feel like I’ve truly made this space into a home, so I hope you can bear with me. I’ll be blogging away as usual, don’t you worry 🙂

Yay!

Lots of love,

Kez xoxo

No dummy.

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So it happened. Yesterday morning. He coughed and it fell in the toilet. And that was that.

Yep. After months of wondering when the right time would be to tackle the Little Mister’s giving up of the dummy/pacifier/binky/soother (whatever you know it as), fate sorted it out for me quick smart.

The Little Mister is 3 years and 4 months old(ish). He has had a dummy for sleep time for most of his life. Until he got all of his teeth (May last year), he had one whenever he really needed one because it helped soothe his gums somehow. He hasn’t regularly had a dummy when we’re out and about since he was maybe just turned 2, I think (he had a setback when we travelled overseas and he felt a bit out of his comfort zone mid 2014).

I remember worrying so much when a nosy, opinionated check out operator judged me for giving him one. The poor kid was only 18 months old or so. Now I look back and realise I shouldn’t have given a rats what she thought. So he looked older than he was. Big deal. I knew the truth and I knew what he needed. I cringe when I think of myself feeling so damn self conscious overseas. My poor kid looked almost 4 years old, but he was 2 and a half. None of the kids in Korea his age had them. Truth is, he didn’t normally have one in public at home anymore either. But he was insecure and anxious without it – the dummy gave him security, soothed him and helped him to handle our crazy trip so well. I should have just been proud of him. Realised that it was an issue for later, back on home soil.

I feel embarrassed that I cared so much what others (strangers might I add) thought. I don’t know why, but people have a real bee in their bonnets about dummies. Seriously? For the Little Mister it was just as effective as a teething toy. It was his teething toy. It worked so much better than any Sophie the Giraffe or whatever other trendy things are on the market (and might be working really well for a lot of other children). He didn’t want the frozen teething rings, the special chewable toys. That worked for him. What’s the difference? Why is it OK for kids to chew on frozen finger foods and teething rings, but not to have a dummy in their gobs? It’s the weirdest double standard.

When he started to talk, I would tell him I couldn’t understand him if he had his dummy in his mouth. We started gently to tell him that dummies are for babies (which has backfired occasionally in public when he’s felt the need to tell other toddlers – just for the record I know he’s been such a hypocrite and I am not judging anyone – especially after our own experiences haha). We created a routine where he wouldn’t get breakfast or any snacks until he’d given up his dummy for the day (he is highly motivated by food haha). Baby steps.

When he started day care earlier this year, I sent him without his security items. He only goes once a week so a skipped nap isn’t an issue. I just wanted him to not get used to it there. He knows going to “school” (as he calls it) is a big kid thing to do, so I started him the way we plan to continue. I figured that if he absolutely freaked about not having those things, the staff could call me or I could revise my plan later. Turns out, he’s been just fine (although he doesn’t sleep he has quiet time). Yes.

Over the last couple of years, I flirted with the idea of going cold turkey. Of wondering when it was time to force the issue. But my gut just said it wasn’t time yet. He wasn’t ready. It’s kind of like toilet training has been for us. I was waiting for the signs that he was ready.

I have so rarely seen primary school aged children using dummies and other than in documentaries about strange and unusual addictions, I have never seen an adult who couldn’t kick the habit! Which gives great hope, doesn’t it?

So, back to yesterday…

I got him out of bed and guided him to the toilet. He had handed me his little security blankie (which I will let him have forever because CUTE) and he stood at the ready for his morning wees.

*cough*

*plop*

Uh oh…

Let’s just say that dummy was never going near my child’s mouth again!! EW.

It was also his last one. A long while ago, I had decided that I would not be purchasing any more. Once he ran out and had broken or lost all of them, that would be it. I never predicted it would all end when he’d drop one in the loo!

So. I had a choice. Run out and buy a new one before nap time or see how he reacted when I rinsed it and put it in the bin in front of him. I chose the latter. He was a little bit sad…until breakfast time. He is at that stage where he understands that if you have no more of something, that’s it. When we’ve run out of his favourite snack, he can’t have it that day. When he wants something, if we do not have it or cannot find it, he understands. So I figured we had that on our side, at least.

He did suggest to me that we buy some more, but I told him that if we did that, then there would be none left at the shops for all of the babies who needed them (we don’t have a younger sibling for him to blame the milestone on haha).

That morning I found the Sesame Street episode called ‘Goodbye Pacifier’ on YouTube. I showed it to him and explained that Elmo called his dummy a ‘binky’ (an American slang term – wish there was an Aussie equivalent for kids to watch – if there is then let me know!) and that even his hero Elmo (who also taught him about toilet training haha) has given up his dummy and said goodbye to it. He liked the song, ‘Bye Bye Binky‘ (also on YouTube).
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QFnnG8Ap01g]

I felt cautiously optimistic. I was flying by the seat of my pants. Awesomely unprepared if you will! I had always envisioned myself spending weeks preparing him for this moment. Research, a big picture plan all laid out by me. As if! I should have known he’d get a cold, then cough it into the toilet when I was least expecting haha.

Nap time arrived and I was nervous but played it totally cool. I put him to bed and he was sad, but accepting. He cried with heartbreaking little whimpers, but he knew it was time. He knew I believed in him and I told him that it was OK to cry and be a little bit sad (gotta validate those feelings – it’s a big deal), but I knew he was ready because he was such a big boy. I told him I’d be back later and I left the room. I then had to sit on my hands as I watched him on the baby monitor. He whimpered but he never needed me – so brave.

He didn’t sleep (I really didn’t expect him to) but he played in his bed and sang ‘Bye bye binky’ to himself – oh the cuteness!

I’d put a call out to Mr Unprepared to bring something home as a reward. He headed to the shops where he’d found a Thomas the Tank Engine collectible set. The little trains cost $2 each and there was a special display/carrying case for them. Perfect. He could keep it in his room as a visual reminder of what he was achieving. Much like when I gave up mine as a toddler, in order to get myself some really cool glow worms (remember them?!).

Last night I was nervous. He got to bed and a couple of times he told me he wanted his dummy back. I gently reminded him that his dummy was yucky and had to go in the bin. I read him a couple of stories and then told him that if he was a really good boy and was able to be quiet and go to sleep, he’d get a new little train in the morning. HE DIDN’T CRY. NOT EVEN A WHIMPER. I was so impressed. He was a bit tired (from skipping his nap earlier on) and fell asleep in record time. No dummy! I thought, no doubt he’ll wake in the middle of the night, reach for it and be too disorientated to think rationally. I pictured him screaming for it and me stuck in the doorway of his room shooshing him in a soothing tone for hours.

But…he slept right through – no worries!! I thought, maybe when he wakes for the morning just before 7am, he’ll yell out for it. NOPE. He just waited for me to get him like usual. I THINK I’LL KEEP HIM.

It seemed too good to be true (and might still be – understandably – he’s kicking a lifelong habit haha), but then he napped today. No tears. No begging. He did absent mindedly look for it for a second when I came to get him up, but all was good. My Little Mister gets it and I am so glad he was ready.

So much of parenting is about following your gut feeling. Don’t let anyone bully you or shame you for your decisions when it comes to petty things like dummies. Do what is best for your child and they’ll show you when they’re ready for something. Also, no amount of planning can guarantee something will go smoothly. There is nothing wrong with trial and error. Nothing wrong with changing your mind in order to protect the process and nurture your child.

I’ve at least learnt that much in 3 years 🙂

What are your thoughts? How have you done it? Do you feel the pressure from others? Or simply wish me luck for tonight!!! x