A day in the life.

My life hasn’t exactly been the most scintillating this week. After I had fun being 90s rocker Kez at a music festival on Saturday, followed by the pamper fest that was Mother’s Day, reality has come back to hit me in the face. Today was definitely one of those days! I’ve documented it here in tweets, rather than photos because no-one wants to see my dirty dishes, my bra-less, frumpy “staying in” outfit or the fact that the Little Mister wore his pyjamas ALL DAY.

The Little Mister woke me at 2am and I do not think I slept solidly from then until 7am. I spent over an hour loitering in the hallway outside his room while he whinged, stopped, whinged, stopped, whimpered, stopped, cried, stopped. He had misplaced his dummy and when I finally couldn’t take it anymore (do I get points for patient parenting?), I found him sitting bolt upright in the corner of his cot, eyes squeezed shut, having a whinge. He did look so sad. He had tried reeeeeally hard to manage without his dummy (which he is addicted to at sleep time), but it just wasn’t working out. I then spent the next hour awake in bed hoping he wasn’t too uncomfortable or sick and worrying that he might have wet through his nappy (or was due to). I wasn’t going back to have a look-see!!!

It’s starting to feel like a conspiracy. My husband got me tickets for a show a million bajillion years months ago. We’ve been so excited for our upcoming date night and it’s almost here! Of course, the Little Mister spends the lead up to it getting sick with a cold, suffering a sleep regression and developing conjunctivitis. My parents (the lucky babysitters) are a tad nervous as he’s staying overnight and has revived his separation anxiety issues of late! All I can hope for is a guilt free, care free night – fingers (and everything else) crossed!!! Please don’t let this turn into some kind of cruel twist of Murphy’s lore thing.

Yeah, yeah. We watched a bit of teev. Little Mister was quite tired and grumpy and I just needed him to sit still for a while. Meanwhile, I looked on in horror at their native animal scene created soley out of toilet rolls and pipe cleaners and all the things that simply are not found in an every day home.

No joke. 15 minutes of the deepest sleep I’ve ever achieved in such a short time was a lifesaver. I actually felt more rested when I awoke. I guess any sleep is great when you’re existing on 3 hours from the previous night.

Due to his usual form, the Little Mister visited me in his IKEA circus tent (where I may have been hibernating a little), with his favourite book. He likes to wait until I put on my enthusiastic face, start reading in a perky voice and then bail. I stubbornly kept reading, hoping he’d come back but I think I knew the jig was up when I heard Elmo singing some song about loving his goldfish (and his crayons too). I may or may not have stayed in the tent for a bit longer…

It’s so lucky he’s funny and cute. I was fading fast. He likes to use different toys as phones. He puts them up to his ear, says “Hello”, followed by a lot of emphatic nodding of his head and gibberish that sounds very matter of fact. I hate to think that he may be imitating me…am I really like that? :P

It was one of those days where I was stuck at home, feeling cabin fever, frustration at all my plans that were put on hold (Little Mister being in quarantine) and fatigue triggering all my insecure thoughts. It was horrible, but I hung in there as best I could and tried to focus on the Little Mister. A good conversation with my husband on the phone really did do wonders. He was a good listener and very supportive. I couldn’t wait until he got home.

The Little Mister seemed quite suspicious of green beans today for some reason. I tricked him into eating one. He didn’t even notice. One point to me!

Gosh, a hug does wonders. The Little Mister perked right up when he saw his dad (probably sick of my face). That kept him going for a bit longer through arsenic hour.

The Little Mister loves bath time and I think he secretly wanted extra hugs from Mr Unprepared, so instead of insisting on a nudie run around the house (slippery little sucker), he flopped about in his arms so he had to be carried all the way. Little Monster. He’s a heavy little chap.

I am now writing up this blog post, with my feet up. Psyching myself up for a nice sleep tonight (we hope). Once I’ve posted this, it’s snuggle time with my hubby who has been working longer hours this week so we can make tomorrow’s date night possible. Let’s hope our team work gets us through!!

How was your day? Tell me all the boring stuff :)  

This post was a part of the Blog Every Day in May challenge.



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10 things that make me very happy.

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1. Making it through a tough day and still feeling strong. Today has been the mother of all days. Nothing particularly ridiculous has happened, but it was tiring. I forgot to pack the stroller back into the car before setting off to Toddler Jam (an hour of toddler filled chaos dancing and singing). That was fine, but the Little Mister  showed distinct signs of conjunctivitis DURING THE SESSION (and was getting grumpier by the minute) so we had to high tail it out of there. To a pharmacy. Who told us that we would need a prescription for the special eye drops because of the Little Mister’s tender age. So we headed to the doctor’s clinic. Who couldn’t fit us in until later that afternoon. Keep in mind how many times that involves putting him in a car seat and taking him out (right on nap time), plus holding him in my arms when he’s heavy and wriggling. Brought him home for a nap, which went pretty well except for the fact that he was woken by my dog barking at something. We got to the doctor’s on time (after a rushed lunch), only to have to wait 40 minutes in the waiting room. SO WRIGGLY AND GRUMPY FROM A SORE EYE. Back to the pharmacy. Then home. Still no stroller because I’m an idiot.

Despite all that, I finished the day stoked with my efforts. We’d solved the problem (or at least got treatment) and despite being physically exhausted I didn’t feel like melting down or snapping at anyone. I didn’t palm him off onto my husband (who worked late to help us enjoy date night later this week) and I didn’t even want to! I even feel like telling tomorrow to BRING. IT. ON.

There’s no better feeling than the feeling of being mentally strong and knowing you’ve worked hard.

2. Sunshine and the ocean. I could never live anywhere away from the ocean and a sunny climate. When I feel lost or drained, just the sight and the smell of the ocean recharge me. I need to remember this a bit more often.

3. Sleep ins. Duh.

4. Watching the Little Mister grow. His personality cracks me up. There is no joy like watching him as he learns something new. Each day (OK so maybe only 99% of days) is honestly a celebration of SOMETHING.

5. The anticipation before a date night. Date nights are almost unheard of for my husband and I these days. We have had date days and snuggles on the couch with a nice home cooked dinner after the Little Mister has gone to bed, but it’s hard to commit to date nights. This week we’re going to watch Ahn Do’s show – The Happiest Refugee. I couldn’t be more excited. Thanks to my awesome parents, we get a whole day and night to ourselves (and only ourselves) for maybe the first time ever in 18 months. We need to somehow do this more often. I just hope the Little Mister behaves!!

6. My DVR. Seriously. You don’t even understand. It has changed parenthood. If you are able to, before you bring your first baby home, GET A DVR. When you’re up at all crazy hours, you’ll always have something awesome to watch that you chose to record. No weird home shopping network crap in the middle of the night. No missing out on your favourite shows (the ones that start at 9:30pm) because you passed out from exhaustion constantly. I can watch whatever I want whenever I want. I can save all the shows inappropriate for children and watch them by myself at night time. I can pause the TV if the Little Mister wakes up in the night and not miss any of my show/s just because he’s having a tough night. It is seriously one of the best gifts my husband has ever bought for me. I might be MONTHS behind with my favourite shows, but going at my own pace is fine :)

7. The Little Mister’s cuddles. Nothing makes you feel more important or loved. Especially when his face lights up and he takes a giant run up, like he hasn’t seen you in years. Even though all you did was spend 5 minutes in the kitchen. Ask my husband. The cuddles he gets when he walks in the front door after work are just priceless.

8. Music. My life has to have a soundtrack. I need to sing along badly to something. Music makes the Little Mister so happy. There just has to be music in my life. Music in my car. Live music (I remembered this last weekend).

9. Avocados. Seriously.

10. The supportive people who read my blog regularly. You are all amazing and make me feel like all this is 10 times more fun when there’s someone to share it with. In all honesty, I’d probably blab on about my crazy thoughts regardless, because a part of me just has to, but it is so nice to know that people care. I love my blog readers and I love my blogging friends. Thank you :)

Of course, I have so many more amazing things in my life, but I think 10 is enough for now :)

This post was a part of the Blog Every Day in May challenge. 



Doing big person things.

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The Little Mister has become fascinated with any tasks that make him feel like he’s one of the big people. I can’t get the vacuum cleaner away from him. Which seemed like a great thing at the time, but now I’m beginning to have my doubts. It takes about 50 hours longer to get the floors clean. It is adorable, though.

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The Little Mister loves nothing more than sitting up at the table in a grown up chair and “reading” something. Sometimes it’s the newspaper and yesterday it was my day planner. He thought he was doing something very important :)

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I am convinced that the Little Mister will be a great stay at home dad one day haha. Although, when he was done being tender and nurturing with his teddy bear, he did slam him onto the floor unceremoniously so he could go and trash some magazines.

I hope you enjoyed these rare photos of the Little Mister. I don’t often post images of him on this blog.

This post is a part of the Blog Every Day in May challenge.



Oh, that’s funny. I don’t remember asking for your advice.

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The other day was fun. I ventured out of the house with my Little Mister (17 months) for the first time in three days. We were headed somewhere reeeeallly exciting.

Kidding.

We went to the supermarket where I feel like the very least they could do is add my name to the lease, because I friggin’ live there.

The Little Mister was really excited to get back out into the world again, after our huge trip to visit relatives across the country. Everything was so thrilling. He was pointing left, right and centre at every item down every aisle until I would tell him what they were. He was chatting and giving me the kind of cuddles that make you feel simultaneously like you’re going to burst from all the love, but your back is starting to hurt as you huddle over the front of the trolley.

Who doesn’t love a happy toddler in a supermarket? Seriously. Who?

About halfway round, he started showing the signs that he wanted to find the goodies in my handbag. He was getting quite persistent, pointing and grabbing at it, his face all earnest and determined.

I knew I had three choices (based on the environment and the contents of my bag).

1. Don’t give him anything, letting him whinge and cry all he likes. Great for discipline in most places…except a supermarket with a trolley half filled with groceries.

2. Give him snacks to keep him busy and quiet.

3. Hand him his dummy.

I chose option number three. I had my reasons. All of which were valid and seemed suitable in the context of the Little Mister’s particular situation at the time (I’m deliberately choosing not to explain myself in great detail here because the point of this post is to express that we don’t owe anyone and everyone explanations for our parenting choices just because they’re choosing to judge).

The Little Mister allowed me to finish my grocery shopping (quite a large haul to replenish stocks since we got home from our trip) and we were having a really lovely time together.

I chose the closest check out, which happened to be attended by a lady who has always given friendly service and says a smiley hello to the Little Mister. I thought today would be no different, but no. She spied that dummy and she had an agenda.

We’d hardly exchanged the polite, “Hello, how are you today”s, when she launched into it.

“Ooooh,” she said in an ominous tone, “You can have real problems with those [dummies]. You’ll have to hide them away and throw them out. They get addicted.”

I shrugged it off, thinking that she was simply trying to commiserate and that she meant well (she has young children).

She continued to look at the Little Mister’s dummy with a shaking head and look of disapproval.

I politely (because I’m so people pleasing like that) said, “He’s pretty good. He just needs it in the supermarket haha.”

Awkward, nervous mummy jokes are my thing. Noted by the strained, “Haha?” at the end.

“They like it when they’re teething,” she continued, “but you should give him rusks instead.”

She scanned my items while not breaking eye contact with the dummy – not even for a second.

“Tut tut tut”.

Seriously. She tut tut tutted.

By now I wasn’t being very warm and friendly anymore. I wasn’t being rude, but I wasn’t being very receptive.

It wasn’t so much what she said that made me feel annoyed, so much as who she was, what her relationship with us was (ie there isn’t one) and the way in which she stared my son’s dummy down and looked at me like I was a hapless idiot who was clearly making a big mistake and one day that mistake would bite me in the bum.

Here’s the thing, dudes. Body language totally makes a difference. It says so much more than words can.

I did not take so well to being judged by a near stranger and given advice that I knew would not be helpful (in context because he’s MY kid and I live with him/know him/care for him). When I didn’t appear to want her advice, she got a bit cold. Well, screw her. She could have her opinion. We all have opinions. It’s just about knowing/deciding whether it’s appropriate to air them or not. Having an opinion doesn’t mean we’re all experts or that we know all of someone’s story. It doesn’t mean that the recipient has to take on our unsolicited advice (or else it’s a disapproving look for you, love). I just wanted to finish buying my exorbitantly priced groceries and get the hell home for the Little Mister’s nap!

I handed her my shopper rewards card and she said, “Oh? You have a card?” with a surprised tone that almost bordered on sarcasm.

Yes, lady. I have a card. I don’t always have it with me, because I share it with my husband. You really need to stop paying so much attention to me each week. I want impersonal, clinical service (perhaps with just a hint of a warmish smile), please, but I’m not telling you how to do it!! I don’t know your life!!

On the way home (all of a five minute drive) I was fuming. Apart from the over the top “THIS IS GOING ON MY BLOG – SHE WILL RUE THE DAY SHE MET ME!” thoughts, I realised that this lady who is normally very kind and keeps things friendly might have her own sh*t going on in her life. Perhaps she was projecting her own parenting frustrations and perceived failings onto me. I was a soft target. There is no excuse for it, but I do realise that the Little Mister looks at least six months older than he is. At this stage in his life (almost a year and a half old) there seems to be a huge difference between 18 months and 2 years of age in development (based on my observations of the children I know). The poor kid gets judged based on a 2 year old (or older)’s abilities/developmental stages. So unfair. I feel that it’s something I’m going to face more and more with my little man’s height, full head of hair (and I mean FULL) and bright, inquisitive, conversational eyes. He’s fine without a dummy for 90% of the day and we have so many positive little developments, milestones and things we’ve done well in the day that cannot be noticed by a judgemental check out lady while she scans our food items (no matter how much she stares).

The transaction was finalised and the check out attendant said, “Bye. Have a nice day.”

Like the life had been drained from her soul.

I think she knew she had lost me during that exchange and I almost felt sorry for her.

I’m not fuming anymore. I’m just sitting here, eyebrows raised, thinking about how funny it is that we feel entitled to tell others what we think of their situation (even if we don’t know the half of it). Who do we think we are? No-one asked us!

Have you ever received judgement and unsolicited advice from a stranger? How did it make you feel? Please share.

The Case of the Missing TV Remote Control.

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On Monday, March 4, 2013 some time around the witching hour (also sometimes known as ‘arsenic hour’), a black LG TV remote control disappeared from its usual place of inhabitance. One Husband Unprepared (30), an unwitting witness in this case, claimed that he had last seen it when he turned on the television to watch Some Boring Show About Cars (may have paraphrased). The whereabouts of the remote are still unknown.

One suspect is within the sights of law enforcement and has been questioned extensively.

A transcript below:

Investigator: Hey, Little Mister. Where have you put the remote control, mate? Where is it? Where is it?

Little Mister remains tight lipped and flees the scene on a musical dolphin scooter, before he is apprehended once again. Things are looking suspicious.

Investigator: Come on. We know that you took it somewhere. Can you show me where it is? Where’s the remote? Come on, where is it?

Little Mister: Heyooooo *waves*

Investigator: Is it under the couch? In the couch? Behind the TV cabinet? In your toy room? Come on, give it up!

Little Mister: *indistinguishable*

A search was promptly carried out upon the Awesomely Unprepared premises, with leads from the public very valuable. Unfortunately, these leads led to dead ends and the search was abandoned at bath/bottle/bed time.

It has been confirmed that the remote control is not in the following places:

  • On/under/in the couch.
  • Under the fridge.
  • Down the sides of all cabinets/inside all cabinets.
  • In the toy boxes and shelves.
  • In the kitchen cupboard or drawers.
  • The dishwasher.
  • The washing baskets/piles of laundry.
  • Kez’s hand bag.
  • The nappy bag.
  • Inside the occupants’ shoes.
  • The toilets.
  • The bath.
  • The home office.
  • The spare room.
  • The Little Mister’s bedroom (all nooks, gaps, cupboards and baskets accounted for).
  • The lounge room.
  • The play pen.
  • The back of the Little Mister’s Cozy Coupe car.
  • Inside the pram.
  • All window sills.
  • Bins (confirmed by elbow deep search by Husband Unprepared after losing mini discussion over who should do it).
  • All adult height surfaces.
  • All of the home’s bed coverings.
  • The oven.
  • The microwave.
  • The washing machine.
  • Abandoned empty nappy boxes.
  • The high chair.

And several other areas, too numerous to mention.

While the search team remain hopeful of finding the remote control alive and in good working order, it is not known just how long it will take to make a successful rescue.

The suspect has been placed under close surveillance in the hopes that he will lead investigators to the hidden remote. This technique has been known to work with dogs, but success with human toddlers is yet to be determined.

There has been interest shown by local media in covering the case, but the suspect is reluctant to speak in case of incriminating himself. He appears to have developed his own language in order to avoid being caught via phone taps or bugging devices. Experts are trying to piece together his unique speech patterns, which sound much like the wild ramblings of a toddler as this report goes live.

644484_10151352241873218_919064556_nThis shot was taken of the suspect by a current affairs television show, when he was found hiding out on a luxury cruise liner.

For now, the Awesomely Unprepared family has found a compatible remote from another household television which will have to suffice until the correct remote is located. This cautionary tale has brought into question universal household protocol when dealing with remote controls in the future, to avoid repeat incidences. Investigators are reluctant to blame any adults at this time, but may suggest that a review into the Husband Unprepared’s habitual placement of the remote on the arm of the couch, may be needed. Kez Unprepared will smugly maintain that she has always kept the remotes above toddler reaching height.

If you should have any information pertaining to this case, or ideas pertaining to previous cases, please do not hesitate to comment on Facebook or tweet. If you are a toddler, there is a special hotline you can call on your toy phone. The number is 1, 2, 3, 4 or alternatively you can mash a bunch of buttons until a teddy bear picks up.

The Awesomely Unprepared family thanks you for your time and efforts.

 

Little Mister’s First Camping Trip: During and After.

To see how we prepared, the ‘before’ post is available here x

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Seriously, during the Little Mister’s first ever camping experience, the Little Mister had SO MUCH FUN. Surprisingly, so did my husband and I! It was an exhausting experience, but a satisfying one. It was exactly the change of scenery that we needed as a little family. I was feeling like I’d been stuck in a rut for too long (even my blogging inspiration had up and left me) and I felt like the Little Mister was getting restless. It was time to shake things up!

Here’s a little run down of our trip and what we got up to :)

Day 1: We arrived!! It was stinking hot and sunny at our campsite, so my husband, dad and brother set up the tent as quickly as possible, while I chased after the Little Mister. I began to wonder what we’d gotten ourselves into, my dreams of the three of us taking lovely day time naps together dashed – too hot!! We walked down to the local takeaway shop on the waterfront (somewhat of an institution) and bought the BEST fish and chips EVER. I had thought I was too sweaty and icky to want food, but it was awesome. The Little Mister squawked like a freakin’ seagull each time we reached for a chip, but we tricked him with morsels of tasty fish instead – sucked in!

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The Little Mister struggled a bit that night, because he’d never slept in a tent before and we’d thrown him off with a new environment. Looking back, it also became clear that he was cutting a tooth (his mouth is positively exploding with them at the moment)! It took an hour or so (and a little drive in the car) to settle the poor little guy, but once he was asleep, he slept ALL NIGHT! Even the kookaburras (and possibly all the species of the noisiest birds in the world), the cars driving by and the people talking and moving about didn’t disturb him! It probably worked in our favour that we were sleeping a couple of feet away – made him feel secure.

Day 2: My dad thinks he’s really cool now, because he’s gotten in on the paddleboarding trend (yeah yeah you went to Hawaii without me blah blah). I will admit, it is really fun. We all had a go at it (even the Little Mister had a little ride) and it is pretty addictive. I stopped because I was scared I was going to run over a couple of kids on boogie boards, playing in the shallows, but I really did want to have another crack at it! Also? We ordered fish and chips for dinner. Yep. That’s two days in a row, folks. Nutrition? What’s that? Also, it was an excuse to drive down for it so the Little Mister would fall asleep…he did. And he slept all through the night again. I was impressed!

Day 3: Holy cow. The Little Mister was teething up a freakin’ storm. Despite sleeping for a good hour and a half in the car that morning (his record day time sleep for the whole holiday), he was a little wreck. The day went on for so long that I started to become convinced that we had the terrible 2s a bit early. Thank goodness for Bonjela and Nurofen is all I can say! The poor thing even became upset when we took him to the water (usually it’s all smiles and excitement), so we pulled him out and gave lots of cuddles. We stayed positive and hoped for the best!

Day 4: It rained in the morning. Everything was soggy and muddy, with the Little Mister falling over in a few puddles, so we decided that we’d go for some long drives through the forests and it was beautiful.

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Are Karri trees not THE most beautiful trees?!! I couldn’t stop taking photos. You’re lucky I’m only showing you one. Oh, and by the way, the Little Mister returned to his usual, gorgeous self today. I was one relieved mum!

Day 5: Went for a big hike. Little Mister fell asleep for most of it, in the baby carrier my husband wears on his back. He (my husband) feels like it’s good training for a huge 5 day hike he’s planned for later this year, but I don’t think he counted on the Little Mister leaning at funny angles the whole way…the weight distribution was…interesting…

After our 6km walk (which covered almost any kind of terrain you can think of), we felt so good about ourselves that we plonked ourselves in the local cafe and ordered some replacement calories…oops. That’s not how you do it? Oh well. haha.

Day 6:

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Started at 3am. I awoke to hear our chatty campsite neighbours talking (tents are good for eavesdropping from BTW). I was like, “Urgh…shut up…”, but then I heard what they were saying….smell of smoke…fire vehicles…loud hailers and two way radios going off…UH OH!

Suddenly I smelt the smoke and realised my husband had been awake listening too! We eavesdropped some more and realised the fire was RIGHT WHERE WE HIKED THE PREVIOUS DAY (only a little way up the road). Some awful little arsonist had decided it would be fun to wake the whole town, it seemed. The fire was quite close to where we were staying and we were alert, but calm. I checked the website for fire warnings and the situation wasn’t too dire yet, so we tried to get some sleep, while keeping one ear open.

Oh, and the Little Mister slept through all of it…we were on a roll!

We woke with ash on our tent and everything smelt…smoked.

We didn’t want to stray too far today, because we wanted to know the fire was contained before abandoning our camp. We drove up to a look out and watched where the fire was. Thankfully, it wasn’t a big, angry fire like we’ve seen before (my parents had a close call a while back) and the fire emergency people were really amazing, giving it everything they had from the get go. We went for a drive to a famous local surf break and I had to block out my mum’s voice as she kept saying, “This is so much better than Waimea and California…”

Travel brag. Bah humbug!

Day 7: Our last full day at camp. I was starting to feel the ‘last day’ blues. They’re totally real, guys. I was a bit grumpy and tired – to be honest, the fire had killed some enthusiasm with the middle of the night adrenaline rush and the lack of sleep. I was starting to fantasise about my comfy bed at home (after rolling off the air mattress a couple of times) and the simple creature comforts that make life with a toddler a bit easier. I’d had an amazing holiday, but like most camping trips, you end them at the right time, when you start to appreciate what you have at home again. Luckily, my mood was lifted when my parents said, “If you want to go kayaking, we’ll look after the Little Mister…”

My husband and I were out of there LIKE A SHOT. I was all like, “Here’sasnackandhissippycupandasparenappyandsomewipesseeyalater…”

I think we left behind a dust cloud and some tumbleweeds rolling about hahaha. This little break lifted my mood considerably and my husband and I pretended we’ve been kayaking experts all our lives, while trying not to feel self conscious when people on motorboats cruised by, having a little stare. Tick that off our long list of physical activities for the holiday! I was starting to fool myself that I’m a sporty person. Let’s just ignore the fact that we ate double our body weights in soft cheese, dips and crackers…don’t even mention the wine… :)

Day 8: Packing up the campsite was a little more time consuming than we’re used to! It was hard to do things together, so we worked in tandem. My parents were great because they were able to look after the Little Mister while we shoved the tent back into its bag (why are the bags always THIS much too small????) and packed the last of our things.

We got in the car, said goodbye to my parents and before we’d even left town the Little Mister was fast asleep. Bliss. We were so happy to get home after a weird drive (we had witnessed a bizarre accident and people were not driving like they’d earned their licences).

I have to admit, I am missing my holiday a bit now that I’m home with my wifi, air conditioning, solid walls, separate sleeping space to the Little Mister, my laptop, my DVR and my kitchen appliances! There was a lot of good stuff we did – we were more physically active: paddleboarding, hiking, kayaking etc. We were able to devote quality time to each other as a little family much more than you can when you’re running your daily home life, and there was no television to inhibit our interactions. The Little Mister was making massive progress in his development (I’m sure it’s his age too but he just thrived), and life just felt really meaningful. I want to take this experience with me throughout the year and try to hold onto the spirit of it.

What did I learn?

- It really pays to have a supportive partner/helping person. If my husband hadn’t been a really involved, hands on parent too, the trip would have been a nightmare. We tended to work in tandem (sometimes giving each other time to shower or just have five minutes to themselves) and fell into a great rhythm. It was more intense than being at home, because you can’t childproof the outdoors (I’m sure some of us have tried) and it would have been tough without any support. Of course, my parents were brilliant also.

- You have to be willing to break the ‘rules’ and routines. The Little Mister napped at all different times, for not long at all. He scoffed a few more hot chips than I would allow at home and ate a few more pre-packaged meals than usual. He was occasionally bribed with snacks and he was driven around in order to fall asleep on a few occasions (something we’ve never done at home). The Little Mister even had bath time much earlier than usual, because it was just easier to take him after a swim or an activity when the other babies/toddlers at the caravan park weren’t forming a peak hour bath time line! We surrendered ourselves to this, as we were in a different environment and trusted that the Little Mister would know the difference once we were home. I hope I don’t sound like a wanker, but if you hear me out, the point is that it was important to relax. If we’d tried to be as strict as we are at home, none of us would have had any fun! We’d be stressed out to the max, because it would have been almost impossible to recreate home in a tent! We adapted to what was best and if something didn’t work, we were flexible. It paid off. It was actually fun to not be in control of everything. I’m going to relax more at home now. I realise he CAN sleep if I don’t just shoosh everyone after 7pm (note to my husband: I’m not a miracle worker – stop banging the freakin’ kitchen cupboards!). I am NOT going to wreck him if I take him out at nap time occasionally. He proved himself over and over and now we’re home he’s settled back in with almost no fuss (I say ALMOST – perhaps a little understandable anxiety at nap time). I should give us all a little more credit :)

- A change of scenery is not just good for the Little Mister but for my husband and I. We came home happy and giddy and ready to connect more as a couple, not just as co-parents. Those short moments alone in the evening where we held hands and walked to the toilet block (haha how romantic), sharing our reflections on our day – just awesome. We were reminded of how well we can work as a team (usually erecting a tent – not a euphemism you pervs – or paddling in a kayak IN TIME WITH EACH OTHER are our weaknesses LOL). I hope that we can recreate this nice feeling with more us-time and date days/nights as we’ve had very few of these since the Little Mister was born.

- I know I’ve joked before about the ‘children should not ever be exposed to the evils of television before the age of 2 – or ever’ people…but I did see how less television benefited the Little Mister. While he needed some Giggle and Hoot on my mum’s tablet sometimes before bed (quiet time and something familiar), he really did thrive without it. I loved that without any at all, we all chatted more. We’ve never been excessive with the TV around the Little Mister (I do agree that moderation is best), but I am seeing where I could cut back (except for when I need to go to the toilet!!!).

- I am strong. Not mentally (I know that already – some call it stubborn but I disagree – of course). Physically! I mean, I know I’m strong in relation to being a mummy. I lift the Little Mister a million times a day after all! I mean me as an individual! All my life I’ve struggled with a lack of upper body strength, but on this holiday I paddled the sh*t out of everything and I walked kilometres without feeling like dying! This made me feel all empowered and womanly – HEAR ME ROAR! :) I needed that boost.

- I want to do it again.

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You can read about our camping trip from the Little Mister’s perspective here!

Have you camped with a toddler (or toddlers, you brave soul) before? How was your experience? Are you considering it for the first time? Share by leaving a comment x

Little Mister’s First Camping Trip: Before.

ad869d84bd1e568da22cdf5625f63fd1_largePic: This looks nothing like my experience!

I have been camping in tents and camper vans since I was literally fresh off the plane at five months old (I was adopted in case you’re reading that and wondering what the hell that means)! My parents started these amazing family traditions that have carried all the way into my adulthood and I always knew that when I had a child/children of my own, I would like to continue it with a new generation! In fact, the idea has always made me feel quite sentimental! I’ve had my own tent/s and ‘camping kits’ (full of the basics everyone should have for a quick trip) since I was a tween and I’m usually pretty well prepared!

The idea of taking the Little Mister on his first ever camping trip at the age of 14/15 months, however, scared the crap out of me and I lived up to the title of this blog: Awesomely Unprepared! :)

This wasn’t going to be as easy as throwing a tent, crappy mattress, my camping ‘kit’ (which stays completely assembled in a sealed plastic crate in the shed all year round) and some clothes (thrown hastily into a bag at the last minute) in the back of our spacious car! This was going to be serious! We were moving HOUSE for a week (as you do – even for a day – when you have a toddler or baby)!! We’d need a port-a-cot, sippy cups, baby cutlery, baby bowls, bottles, steriliser (we went for a powered tent site), dummies (pacifiers), extra towels, wipes galore, nappies (a week’s worth), etc etc etc!!!

We had to plan ahead like never before! None of this procrastination sh*t!! We even had ‘family meetings’ with my parents to prepare. We had to decide on when to go – the best time being when school goes back after the summer holidays (quieter) and who would take what. We also had discussions about which caravan/camping parks would be best for having a toddler around and we concluded that the same park we’d stayed in annually for most of my own childhood was best suited to us. It had open spaces for a little one to run around, we had been there for MANY years since I was about one year old myself, so we were familiar with what challenges and facilities there would be. We knew the activities we would be able to undertake at only walking distance from the park, as well as the good places to take a drive, have a nice walk or hang out.

Now that I’ve mentioned that we went with my parents, it’s a good time to give some advice! If possible, take your first camping trip with someone who’s been there before or is a very helpful person/couple. It made our trip possible! I was too daunted to do this with only my husband and I! I needed someone around who had done this before (for moral support and good advice) and who would be able to offer the extra few hands when needed!

Because time would be limited when I would be free to pack properly, with my husband working Monday to Friday (like a “normal” person) these days, I decided to be as prepared as I could and the packing/organising process started very early. Gone are the days of ridiculous procrastination!!! A week out, I planned our afternoons (the period between my husband getting home from work and the start of the Little Mister’s night time routine) so that if we worked flat out, we could relax in the evenings once the Little Mister was in bed. I simply do not have the energy to bother with all that crap late into the night like I used to! I found that this would work best because trying to do everything on my own with the Little Mister (who was teething like CRAY CRAY) just wasn’t going to happen.

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My husband looked at me funny, when he accidentally caught a glimpse of my day planner, but bless his Explorer socks from Woolies, he just let me do my thing!

PS? It worked! It resulted in less stress all round and when we fell into bed (at like 8:30pm because we were knackered) we felt relaxed, instead of annoyed, anxious or (I speak just for myself here) making mental lists of things to do/pack all through the wee hours of the night!

There was practical stuff to think of on our day of departure too. Like making sure that the supplies the Little Mister would need for the drive (approx 3 hours including stops), such as food, wipes, nappies, etc were packed right next to his car seat and easy to grab. We had some roof space (some new racks and a great cargo basket), so we put the things we’d need to set up straight away – tent, tables, etc on top. That way, we’d save time when we arrived – something that’s important when you’re trying to juggle tent poles and toddlers at the same time!

Something that was just as important as the practical stuff, was the mental preparation. We went into this experience with realistic hopes and expectations. Would this be relaxing? Probably not! Would it be hard work? Most certainly. Would it feel like the camping holidays we had before children? HELL NO! Once we let go of the old expectations of a summer camping holiday (memories of sitting for hours in a camp chair reading magazines and novels, long spontaneous walks on the beach with only your romantic partner, packing and unpacking with both hands, eating nibblies in peace etc), we were ready to take on the trip. You think I’m not selling this experience very well? Well, it was amazing. It was just that. An experience! Seeing the Little Mister running about in the dirt, acclimatising to all these new sights and sounds, spending quality time with us (no TVs, limited phone use, no housework, boring daily errands – nothing to take us away from him) was priceless.

With the right headspace and the right mental preparation, we were able to enjoy the holiday so much more.

So, in summary, here is my unsolicited advice on first-time camping with a toddler:

- Plan where and when ahead of time. It takes away the risk of finding a place is too busy, booked out or not the safest/nicest environment for your little dude or lady.

- Go with someone who has had kids (grandparents are ideal) and camping experience or who can provide an extra bunch of hands. They’re great for moral support and for making the experience more pleasurable. Many hands can make light(er) work.

- Start packing early. Don’t procrastinate. The experience leading up will contain less arguments, more mental space and everyone will be on the same page. Work out a packing/checking of gear/shopping for supplies schedule that works around your work hours/life schedule/toddler routines and you’ll be breathing easy by the time the big day of departure arrives (rather than being exhausted and grumpy as hell – not the best way to start a holiday)! I worked from the heavy, big stuff (tent, camp stove etc) and the stuff that didn’t need to be used until the last minute, working towards the things like phone chargers, baby stuff and toiletries which are harder to pack early.

- Plan the packing of your vehicle for convenience. Stuff you’ll need first when you arrive should be easy to find/pull out of your car. Things like a day bag for your toddler’s journey there need to be really handy for quick nappy changes or snack times.

- Get mentally prepared. Be realistic. It won’t be ALL sunshine, laughter and easygoing fun. There will be challenges along the way. You’ll have to be extra vigilant. You will have a dirtier, more tired, extra curious toddler to run around after! If you have a positive mindset, you will realise this is more for them than for you and the joy you will find (despite being exhausted) will be priceless. An amazing memory of a great ‘first’ for your family.

Read the next post about the during and after of our holiday here x

That’s just how I toddle.

tumblr_lxgm5hUxPR1r04ysvo1_500_largePic: “Come on, pooch. We’re gonna miss our bus!”

I don’t know exactly how this came to be, but we have a toddler in our midst (not to be confused with gorillas in the mist – although they make similar sounds). I think I just believed that the Little Mister would be a baby forever. I got used to calling him “baby” and “bubba”. I mean, he’ll always be my baby, much in the same embarrassing way that I still call my 10 year old dog my puppy…just not so much in public haha.

I’m only just coming to terms with referring to the Little Mister as a toddler. I have a TODDLER. It takes some getting used to. Each day he grows into the title more and more, so I guess it starts to roll off the tongue a little easier!

However, I can’t help but be painfully aware of the news stories I keep reading about toddlers. Have you ever seen headlines such as…

“Toddler stays by his parents’ side all day long.”
“Toddler doesn’t get lost at all. Ever.”
“Toddler doesn’t put anything except food in his mouth.”
“Toddler never enters a body of water unattended.”

Yeah, didn’t think so.

However, I do find comfort in the fact that sometimes toddlers go missing only to be rescued by their faithful, furry friends. I’m not talking about that loyal kid Timmy with the inexplicable body hair. I’m talking about dogs. Or puppies as you may still call them because you can’t let go (not that I have a problem or anything)…

All you have to do is google ‘dog rescues toddler’ and you won’t believe the number of stories that come up! This makes me feel good because I have not only one dog but two! OK, so one (who shall remain nameless) would probably run into traffic and teach the Little Mister how to find and eat dead things, but the other (my beautiful 10 year old puppy) would no doubt lead him home when they both got hungry.

Then there was this story. A toddler boarded a bus alone from a shopping complex unbeknownst to his mother and travelled roughly 23km (just over 14 miles) away before being found! Talk about your heart in your mouth!! There were two theories. Apparently he either negotiated roughly 6 sets of traffic light intersections on one of the busiest streets in the city to get to the bus station, or he boarded one bus straight out of the shopping centre, then transferred himself to another one!! I hope he bought a ticket!

Also, there’s such a thing as the terrible twos. I get this really strange feeling that the Little Mister is going to go through this early. God help us. He’s already pointing at things he wants and putting on a show of grumpiness if he can’t have it. When I say ‘putting on a show’, I mean he looks at me for a second (direct, piercing eye contact), then he drops his bottom lip. When I don’t give in, he repeats the eye contact, followed by a crocodile cry. Yep. He’s not even 13 months old yet. Luckily he is usually distracted easily and is naturally a happy go lucky dude, but his ability to retain and remember things is getting a little too good for my liking!

I must be strong, though! This toddler parenting takes some (metaphorical) balls! And we’ve hardly even got started! I ain’t seen nothin’ yet, as many parents of older toddlers would be thinking right about now!

This is a fun time, though. The Little Mister loves to point at things so I can tell him what they are. Right now it’s all about lights and anything on the ceiling, really. Today we have established the fact that there are 3 lights, a manhole, a smoke alarm, 2 framed pictures and a vent in our passageway…about 20 times. I love how curious he is and I can tell he’s saving all these words and memories up so that later he can tell me what they are! A toddler certainly makes you look at the world (or even just your house) in a whole new way. He isn’t bored walking around (and around and around) hand in hand with me for aaaaages. He’s just finding pleasure in the small things – being able to use his legs and appreciating his great company (that’s me). He has the names of sooooo many things to discover. Everything is fascinating – even for the fifty millionth time. I think that’s pretty awesome.

He’s not quite walking confidently yet (he has the gait of a slow moving zombie and each day I am fighting the urge to dress him up as one before taking hours of hilarious video footage), but when he starts to run I shall be tethering him to a dog, while wearing a permanent floatie and perhaps we’ll install some shock absorbers, a radio beacon and some kind of GPS attached to a surveillance camera (so I can tell when he’s eating supposedly inedible objects). Do you think the bomb squad could be on call with their special robot thingies that have the long arms with the grabby bits on the end? You know, in case he’s spotted a mile away eating a plastic bead or something?

FAQ: So what have you been up to lately?

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Hmm. Whenever somebody asks me this question in person, I get into some kind of brain fart situation and I can’t think of a thing. Anyone else do that? My answer just ends up being something awkward along the lines of, “Not much. Just parenting and living and stuff. Y’know.”

Yeah. I know.

So I am going to try to summarise it all in writing for you, because I’m sure you really really care, and also I can’t think of anything else to write about this week that actually makes sense.

So…
I spend a lot of time walking in circles around my house. Seemingly aimlessly. So there’s that. Besides my usual insanity, this is often done with my pinky finger attached to a chubby little toddler hand. The Little Mister has decided that he loves long strolls with the lady of his choice (until some time around puberty I imagine that’s me). He hasn’t figured out where it is he would like to go, but it’s all good as long as he has his walking buddy. Each time he takes a break by plopping onto his nappy padded bum, he then reaches up for my hand and it starts again. So that’s about an hour of each day (at least) accounted for.

I have also been very busy planning each trip I take to the toilet. I’m surprised I haven’t had to write it down in my day planner, along with a long list of reminders of the very detailed process. If my husband is home it’s slightly easier. It involves loudly announcing, “I’m going to the toilet. ALONE.”
This is my husband’s cue to intercept the Little Mister before he catches up to me and busts through the door action movie hero style, to catch the bad guy (that’s me – guilty as charged for not inviting a toddler to watch me do my business). If I am alone, I have to announce subtly that I am leaving for the toilet. I then have to gently walk away down the corridor. I have to shut the door, jiggling the handle just right so it’s harder for a little monster to open. I then have to pee, wipe and flush in record time before I am caught up with. If I want to do number 2s (sorry for the TMI but I poop just like everyone else), this process involves me turning on the kids’ TV channel, praying it’s a bright, colourful show that will keep the Little Mister’s attention and sneaking off like a ninja. Whoever says that letting the TV babysit your child for even a minute is evil, because it will rot their brains, can look after my child when I’ve gotta ‘go’. Seriously. I just have to do what works. Although, occasionally it doesn’t work. Sometimes I get a crying child outside the toilet door. I have been known to spend time doing my business and singing kids’ songs at the same time. I’m glad we have no neighbours on that side of the house, because I can tell you, they would think I was a lunatic. I mean, we know I kind of am, but SHHHH. IT’S A SECRET. I once sang “If you’re happy and you know it, clap your hands…” (that’s multi tasking for you) and when I finally emerged from my hidey hole, I found the Little Mister, tears streaming down his face (all that awful parental rejection does that to you) while pathetically clapping his hands. Aw, it breaks your heart.

Hmm, what else can I tell you? I actually occasionally do do (haha I said “do do”) something interesting, but I usually forget this when someone asks me what I’ve been up to lately. I give my standard awkward answer and then everyone (including me) thinks I’m boring. Last Thursday I was lucky enough to attend a luncheon where Mia Freedman was the guest speaker at Bistro Guilluame. Mia (Ha! Look at me acting like we’re on a first name basis!) was everything I hoped she would be in person. Bubbly, candid, inspiring and so down to earth that for a split second I honestly thought we could be friends if I just spent a few minutes stroking her hair and talking about motherhood with her. If you haven’t heard of Mia (Shock! Horror!), then you should first reassess your friendship with me, and after you and I agree that we will overlook that transgression, you would know that Mia has been editor of the Australian Cosmo, Cleo and Dolly magazines. She now runs a very successful website called Mamamia, which features amazing blog posts by a diverse bunch of contributors who really get me inspired and inform me about the world around me (outside of my Living with the Little Mister bubble)! It makes me laugh, cry and really think deeply about topical issues. Have I raved enough yet? So that was really really fun. I now want to be a power blogger…or a lady who lunches. Can’t decide. Either way, it was a great day out with my friend Bec where I could eat with both hands and concentrate on full conversations. Hooray!
Check this out, y’all:

I’m a little embarrassed by how excited I was to have my tweet replied to. I sound like such a tragic fangirl. I just have to put it out there: Mamamia and Mia’s work have really been a sanity saver since I became an Awesomely Unprepared Mummy! I’m not too cool to admit it ;)

We had weather again in these parts. Last night I was very outraged when I couldn’t hear the television over the wind and rain. I spent ages thinking deeply about the bad acoustics in my living room (our backs to a big window which lets in outside noise) and frantically adjusting the volume up and down. My husband had to almost remove pry the remote from my hands because I kept pausing the live TV (my new DVR IS AMAZING) each time a gust of wind passed by. However, things got a little worse when we went to bed (it’s always just as you snuggle down and you’re almost peacefully slumbering) and the fence started flapping about. So there’s something new for my poor husband to fix. He had to dismantle the flappy bits (haha flappy bits – I’m juvenile) while only wearing a pair of boxer shorts and an old work shirt. Well, he didn’t have to only be wearing those items, but the point is, he volunteered himself for the job and I couldn’t be more grateful. When he returned to bed it was like sleeping next to a very dejected ice cube.

Other than that, I dressed the Little Mister up as a cowboy for one of his friends’ birthday parties. He drank half the pool at swimming lessons (he gets really excited when his face gets near the water and opens his mouth really wide in a look of enthusiastic awe – EVERY TIME). He’s been teething. He points at things so I can tell him what they are, but sometimes I think he just points at one thing when he’s looking at something else and it’s all really just a big confusing game – he’ll probably spend the first few years of his life thinking that a dog is called a wall and a light is called a sippy cup.

It’s not the most glamourous, high powered kind of life, but I like it :)

What have you been up to lately?

So I didn’t really think that through…

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So on Wednesday, we took the Little Mister to have his 12 month immunisations (having a birthday isn’t always that fun). As usual we rocked up to the local family health clinic where we waited to have his name called out. Of course, just like every other time, the little man was super happy, talkative and cute. I was feeling guilty (and dreading the days ahead) and my husband was…well, he was there. He knows I need my support person :)

On that day, three needles were to be administered.

“Would you like two in the arms and one in the leg, or two in the legs and one in the arm?” the nurse asked.

My husband and I looked at each other, like “WTF? It’s all bad.”

But we muttered something like, “Um…you decide?”

Two in the legs and one in the arm it was. The Little Mister was such a good boy. I distracted him with a rattle and a maraca (why do nurses always have maracas?), and he only cried a little. We gave him a dummy and big cuddles, which he responded to very well as the nurse reiterated what the side effects might be. Mostly that he’d be grumpy as f*ck for a couple of days and that we would be waiting in complete and utter suspense to find out if he would get cold and flu symptoms anywhere from 5-12 days later (it’s been 2 – I’m still waiting and hoping we’ll sail through it). Fun times.

Fast forward to today and the Little Mister was (over)due for a haircut. That kid has won the hair lottery (he probably won’t thank us for it later). He has two parents with very fast growing hair, the volume of his dad’s hair and the straight, softness of mine. This all equals a massive head full of voluminous, but straight hair that goes in many directions. Until today, I had procrastinated about getting his hair cut. I had felt like I had all the time in the world, but it all caught up with us. I knew that the day it started to look a bit like an 80s mullet, something had to be done.

So…what did we do? Here’s my first mistake: Taking the Little Mister to sit in a chair while a lady he doesn’t know stood behind him with a sharp implement. Yeah, I’m thinking big time flashbacks. He started crying and looking so sad. He spent half of his haircut gripping me around the neck in a hug that said, “Don’t let me die!!! I’m tooooo young!!! Not again!!!!”

The hairdresser was a lovely lady and she did a great job. She mentioned that she had three sons, so I guess she knew the drill. She kept her cool and got the job done as calmly and quickly as possible. I kept telling the Little Mister that she was nice and she wouldn’t hurt him, but he was reliving his own little nightmare. That kid was back in the trenches, man. It was tough!

My second mistake?

Trying to distract him with a rattle. Yeah. You can see where that’s going. Same thing I tried when we TRICKED HIM the other day so a strange lady with a sharp implement could jab at him THREE TIMES. His accusatory/terrified face said it all.

Sigh. I feel like I wasn’t quite on top of my parenting game today.

I backed out of the salon saying, “Sorry! He’s normally so great in these situations! I don’t know what happened.”

Of course it dawned on me as soon as we were back in the car. Picture the biggest face-palm EVERRRRR. DUH, KEZ!

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So, learn from my mistake. Do not take your child for their first proper salon haircut two days after immunisations.

You’re welcome.