In the last few days, I’ve been feeling a bit attacked by my anxiety monster (her name is Patrice because “NOBODY ASKED YOU PATRICE!” – it’s a How I Met Your Mother reference – too obscure?). The timing of it makes sense. It’s a busy time of year, I’m tired, my hormones are probably all over the place because my body can’t seem to get its act together fertility wise. I’m worried about the future (anxiety’s favourite pastime) because of that whole situation. As usual, I just have to wait her out. Patrice is a bitch and never knows when to leave, even though I’ve stood up and I’m holding the door open and yawning and saying stuff like, “Oh is that the time? Gosh I have so much to get done…”
It’s hard getting stuck in your head and having to fight your way out all the time, but it is what it is. I’ve learned to accept that anxiety comes and goes and I can’t be obsessed with the fact that it is there and never at peace about it. I just have to manage it better each time. So I will. I will try to be kinder to myself, I will take what little time I get for self care, and I will not forget that this too shall pass. My life has lots of good things in it and I won’t let Patrice’s pessimism make me miss out on enjoying and appreciating them.
In the spirit of finding the positives, I’ve decided that it’s time for a happy list, because plenty of things have been making me happy lately – gotta spread those good vibes!
Getting away for the weekend with Mr Unprepared
We were child free – just the two of us – for the weekend so we could go and watch Josh Pyke and Bob Evans perform in Dunsborough. It was fantastic!
I was thrilled to be kid free (no offence little man) and it was nice to have a change of scenery. I get really restless these days and it was so great to be somewhere other than my house, the Little Mister’s school or the supermarket haha.
Josh Pyke and Bob Evans’ music has been such a part of our relationship over the years – some of their songs seeing us through significant moments, other songs were played at our wedding – so it felt fitting that we were able to celebrate our 9th anniversary of marriage a little early by seeing them play together!
Watermelon
I’ve gone crazy for it. I love how refreshing it is when it’s juiced. I love it when it’s all cut up and ready to eat! I’ve balled a bunch of it and put it in a takeaway container in the fridge ready for snacking (I get so annoyed by having to cut it constantly) and I am obsessed with watermelon flavoured coconut water!
I’ve never been as crazy for watermelon as I am now! I think that with all of my Kez Gets Physical efforts, my cravings have changed a lot for the better. Not gonna lie, I still think about donuts more than a person should, but I’m enjoying my new healthier approach!
Warm, sunny weather
And it’s not just the fact that it’s sunny and warm! It’s the fact that it’s become more consistent! It was so tiresome trying to figure out what to wear each day, as the weather went from one extreme to another! I love just putting on a skirt/pair of shorts and a tank top and just going. It’s so much easier than layering and worrying about what the weather will do in the course of a day! You wake up, you know what you’re going to get, you wear the same thing ALL day with no probs. Yes. It’s the little things!
The Gilmore Girls
Sorry not sorry! I love that show (after being quite the late adopter and binge watching the first 7 seasons this year for the first time) and the fact that it’s been revived has me over the moon! I am so scared to watch all of the episodes too fast in case I get to the end and fall into a deep well of sadness too soon haha.
I love that show. It’s so good for the soul!
Do you have a character you relate to most? I think I was definitely Lane in high school minus the scary mum – more in the quirky rock and roll sense (bonus points because she’s Korean although I’m a fake Korean with white parents and stuff but shhhh), and I think I’m definitely a lot of Lorelai as a mum. Not sure if that’s good or bad yet haha.
Mr Unprepared buying new jeans
I am sorry, but I have to mention it because it truly did make me so happy and this is a happy list. Mr Unprepared has been losing weight too and peeps have been noticing. I’m quite proud and impressed. BUT…he is reluctant to dress for his size. His pants were looking really baggy and falling down and I was starting to get mad at him because he wouldn’t get himself a new pair of jeans that fit him! *insert massive eye roll here*
I had fun being his stylist on the weekend – he wasn’t sure about it all (he made whiny little protest-y noises but I just tuned them out hahaha), but I convinced him and DAMN he looks fine in his new jeans! DAMN!
Wanna know how baggy his old jeans were? So baggy that when he got new, slimmer fitting jeans he spent all night freaking out because he could feel fabric on his calf muscles. So basically, for longer than I care to know, he has had jeans so baggy that his legs literally did not touch the sides. WTF.
NO MORE WEIRD OLD MAN JEANS. NO MORE.
Gosh he’s lucky to have me.
Other stuff that has made me happy:
- Coleslaw. I am back to last summer’s obsession and I’m not mad ’bout it.
- It’s the last full week of the school term. YES.
- Feeling the positive effects of my own weight loss so far.
- That one Monday per fortnight that I get to just do whatever I want/have been putting off during school hours.
- Getting a positive review from our Air B&B host – god I’m a sucker for external validation ?
- Facebook groups full of supportive people.
What’s been making you happy lately?
