Mother’s Day shout outs.

I was just going to make a little Facebook post for Mother’s Day, but realised that I have soooooo much to say. Probably a bit too much for Facebook. Which wouldn’t be out of character ?

Anyway, I’ll start with myself (what an ego – kidding – just getting it out of the way)!

I am so grateful to be a mum. When I say that, there’s a lot of weight to it. I have truly realised in the last 3 years of secondary infertility hell that being a mum is not a right. Becoming one is not a certainty for anyone. You can do all the right things (and then some) but at the end of the day it’s nothing but a crazy, lucky privilege (even if it seems to come easier for some). And for all my struggles to add to my family, I am so ridiculously grateful that I get to be called mum (probably 50,000 times a day – more on weekends and school holidays). I am so glad I get to whinge about about how hard it is and so glad I get to celebrate how amazing and heart burstingly fulfilling it is. Whatever happens from here on out, I will always be so glad that I have the Little Mister – he’s made me a mum and I am so glad he was meant to be in this world, hanging out with me and being my kid. I wouldn’t change that for ANYTHING.

Now onto my mum. My mum is amazing. She (and my dad) went through infertility struggles too. These led to the history making decision to adopt. And bam – there I was – in her arms (followed 3 years later by my bro). Well, not ‘bam’. It wasn’t easy. It was a long wait, with a lot of gruelling hoops to jump through. When you adopt, you have to actually prove you are going to be a good parent. It’s like having to earn a parenting license. Not many people have to do that. Maybe more should! But here we are. My mum is someone I have not always got along with (those teen years were a bit rocky!) but I have always been able to trust her. If she says she’s there, she’s there. If she says I need to figure something out for myself, it means she knows I’m strong enough. She’ll never tell me a white lie to make herself feel better. She’ll tell the the truth so I know I can believe her. She’s strong, assertive and confident. That inspires me. She’s also pretty effing amazing at putting outfits together and fantastic for the fashion advice! She’s been there for me emotionally, especially through the infertility stuff. She’s been there physically too. Babysitting and driving the Little Mister to school. I’m so lucky to have such a supportive network of people around me. She cries at the drop of a hat when talking about how she feels about being my mum and that makes me feel kind of special (can you IMAGINE when we went to see Lion together?!). My parents taught me that family isn’t just blood. Because of my parents, I am the compassionate people person that I am. I have no doubts about that. I love you, Mum!

My mother in law deserves a mention too. She loves the Little Mister to bits. She will never say no to being there for him or us and while I insist that we never take advantage of her, it is so nice to know she’s there in our corner. She always calls me on my birthday or checks in if Mr Unprepared is away. Thank you!

To my mums’ group. The OG MG. You have helped to shape my experience as a mum. We met on a fateful day in early 2012 (after a few weeks of trying to get the hang of leaving the house with an infant) and we’ve never failed to support each other or be there since. We have laughed, cried and stood up for each other. We’ve celebrated milestones and we’ve found out we are good drinking buddies when we can get babysitting too ? Thank you – each and every one of you. For being exactly who you are and bringing together our crazy melting pot of personalities in the most wonderful way.

Now, onto you lot.

I wish all of my fellow mums out there an amazing Mother’s Day. I hope you are pampered and loved. I hope you feel safe and happy. I hope the most important people in your life have let you know just how special you are to them.

To all of the women who dream of being a mum, but have struggled. I am so sorry. This shit is hard. I hope that one day your dream is realised. I am sorry that today might be hurting your heart. I’m thinking of you.

To the women like me, who feel their family is yet to be complete – we are so lucky to have what we have, but it’s OK to want more. Our hearts are big enough. I send all of my love to you. I hope this year is our year.

To those who no longer have their mums around. I’m sorry. I can’t imagine.

Happy Mother’s Day to those who have stepped up to parent and love children who are not biologically theirs, whether through fostering, adoption, blended family situations.

Happy Mother’s Day to the single mamas out there. That shit is tough!! I won’t even pretend to know the half of it! You’re amazing. You’re strong. You’re doing the best you can and that is bloody good enough. Probably more than.

My thoughts are with those who have suffered the loss of a child of any age – from pregnancy to adulthood. They were so lucky to have had you as a mum – even if it wasn’t for anywhere near long enough. My heart goes out to you.

Basically, if you are a mum in your heart, I wish you the best. Not just on Mother’s Day but all of your days. No matter what your situation is, I hope you have/find joy and laughter and love.

*raises glass*

To us.

via GIPHY

Style rules that we need to break.

Recently, I have been reflecting on my own personal style. It has become apparent to me that the things I wear may have evolved since I was a teen but the essence of who I’ve always been is still alive and kicking (the recent 90s throwback trends have not helped haha). I have always loved a rock n roll tee-shirt, ripped everything, black mini skirts and bright colour in my hair (something the 12 year old me was peeved about my mum not allowing)! I have days where I feel like laying low with a casual look that blends in and I have days/nights where I want to go all out and get glammed up. Sometimes I’m super feminine. Sometimes I just want bad ass grunge.

I’m married, I just turned 33 and I have a kid who goes to a private school. While this shouldn’t factor into my daily wardrobe choices, it really really does (even when my kid and husband are nowhere to be seen).

I get scared of judgement if I go out on a bit of a limb. Obviously I am mature enough to understand what’s appropriate vs what is wildly inappropriate in certain settings, but I’m talking about personal style rather than say a person dressing like a stripper at a school function for example!!

I am constantly surprised by the old school attitudes towards women who dare to dress differently. I’ve seen women torn apart in the media for daring to look sexy – “She’s a mother now! THINK OF THE CHILDREN!”

What year is this???

Like being a parent stops you from ever being allowed to bare any hint of cleavage or to go out and have a good time while looking gorgeous, because for once you got babysitting and time to actually put an effort into your appearance!

Coupled up girlfriends have faced comments like, “If you’re dressed like that, you look like you’re out on the prowl!”

What the actual fuck? Isn’t that a slightly sneaky version of slut shaming???

Can’t a woman dress for herself in something that makes her feel gorgeous without people believing it’s an invitation for men to have a crack?

Sometimes I get scared. Do I look like “mutton dressed as lamb” if I wear that ripped tee? Is it OK for me to wear pleather? Does my hair look ridiculous with the splashes of turquoise? When will I be too old to do as I please?

I’m not actually very wild, by the way. I look quite ‘respectable’ by old school prude terms. I just have a hint of rock chick about me on good days (i.e. days where I feel confident and actually have more than 5 minutes to put myself together). But I want to be braver. I think perhaps I’m too dialled down to the point where I feel like I lose who I am and I get frustrated. I think I could get away with being dressed a little more like ‘me’, but I often don’t out of fear.

I have so many style crushes on women who break the ‘rules’. Sometimes it’s because I wish I had their style, but mostly it’s because I wish I had their courage. I wish I could just not give a fuck what people might say/think if I dare to be different.

I think it’s time to throw out the ‘rules’ based purely on a person’s age, gender, marital or parental status. We should be thinking about what fits, flatters, shows our personalities and makes us feel awesome.

I have a feeling that like me, a lot of my friends dress down when they really feel like dressing up or that they dress up when they really want to dress down. That makes me feel sad. We should dress however the hell we want and celebrate each other for it!

I love when one person has the courage to just be themselves – it makes me feel brave too. I think it’s contagious.

I hate when I feel over-dressed/under dressed and keep comparing myself to other people. I hate when people make passive aggressive remarks about someone’s choice of high heels. Or ask them “aren’t you cold in that?” when the person is perfectly comfortable. Why do we do that to each other?

A friend told me that she was told that mothers shouldn’t wear short shorts. My comment back was along the sarcastic lines of “Yeah, you have to be careful because your uterus might fall out after all that birthing of children.”

Seriously. WTF.

I hate that some men think we’re dressing just for them if we put an effort in, and that women perpetuate this myth by telling each other not to be too pretty or daring or not to show boobs AND legs at the same time – god forbid.

I say that if you look and feel good (whatever your shape or size), if you can carry off a look with an air of confidence and dignity, then fuck the rules! Rules are made to be broken! There are always exceptions!

Every memorable style icon I can think of broke the rules at one point or another. That’s how they stood out and became so admired. Let’s remember that!

Now I must go and try very hard to take my own advice.

What is your personal style? Do you feel like you’re truly able to express yourself? How do you feel about the ‘rules’? 

Taking Stock: May 2017

It’s May! I feel like this year is zooming by, but I’m not mad about it.

It’s time for me to take stock, like I do every couple of months! It’s a great way to capture what’s happening in an exact moment of my life. I find I actually get quite REAL in these posts for some reason. You would probably find out some little things about me that I don’t mention anywhere else. Or not. Who knows. Let’s find out!

Making: time to catch up with myself on this lovely Friday. It’s lovely because it’s Friday and I have a day off from work or boring obligations!

Cooking: is fun on the weekends but not fun during the week when you’re rushed AF.

Drinking: wine tonight. FOR SURE.

via GIPHY

Reading: The Fifth Letter by Nicola Moriarty. I have only just started it. The themes behind the story really resonated with me when I was looking for something new to read, so here we are! I am stoked to actually have something to list here. I am reading more this year like I hoped I would! Not much, but more! Go me!

Wanting: to get to a place in my life where I can commit to anything social/fitness wise/financial without fertility stuff hanging over my head anymore.

Looking: at my Fitbit – I’m charging it right now, so of course I can’t walk anywhere.

Playing: my own music on the way home from the school drop off is the best. I never want to get out of the car because there’s always a good song playing! I think I need a long solo road trip – that would be the best!

Deciding: on what I will do exercise wise today. I think some treadmill time and some Fitness Marshall dance work outs sounds great. I just want it to be fun today.

Wishing: with all of my heart and soul for some fertility success this year.

Enjoying: the quiet. I love the quiet of my house right now.

Waiting: is difficult. I am getting more impatient as I get older, I swear it.

Liking: Instagram stories more now that it’s been around a while longer. I am using it more and looking at other stories more too. I think it’s just an extra procrastination tool to add to my snapchat addiction! I still think they stole it from Snapchat and WTF but it’s growing on me.

Wondering: if the weather will make up its mind about what it wants to do right now. I like that it’s trying to hold onto the warm sun, but I hate that it changes from one extreme to the other in one day! I never know what to wear!

Loving: the fact that I’m finding my own unique style again. Each year I hit a bit of a style slump but there’s no better feeling than picking myself up again and updating my wardrobe.

Pondering: over when I should return to my hair salon and enact the second part of my plan to get really rad hidden rainbow hair happening. I’ve already lightened it once, but I need to go back to get it really bright blonde for maximum fashion colour impact!

Considering: whether or not to start doing afternoon school pick ups through the kiss ‘n’ drop lane. The Little Mister has been nagging me (he thinks it’s such a big kid thing to do) and while the idea of never leaving my car sounds super appealing, a part of me knows I’ve been a bit absent this year at the school with all the fertility shit, so if standing awkwardly at the school gate for a few minutes a day so I get that great after school run-up-and-hug is what it takes to feel like I’m THERE, then I think I’ll do it. Maybe I can pick and choose a few days to do kiss ‘n’ drop when it suits. Compromise!

Buying: jeggings for the first time recently was a little out of character for me, but a great decision (and I can’t believe I’m saying that)! I made sure to buy the ones that basically look like jeans and weren’t too obvious. But the stretchiness of the waistband has been welcomed! My body fluctuates all the time (partly due to constant weird fertility treatment shit and partly because I love food) and I got sick of playing the ‘will I have muffin top today’ game.

Watching: a bunch of stuff on the go on Netflix lately. Chelsea, Riverdale, Designated Survivor. 

Hoping: I’ll get to catch up with some good friends soon. I’ve got a couple of peeps on my ‘must see soon’ list and as soon as my schedule becomes a little more predictable, I can’t wait to arrange something.

Marvelling: at the kindness of strangers. A couple of ladies with really full trollies let me go in front of them at Aldi today because I only had 3 items. They were so nice. That’s the kind of thing that I like to pay forward. I hope I get to do that for someone else soon.

Cringing: at the fact that I had to avoid a good (male) friend at the shops today. I had a bunch of bras in my hand and it just seemed like stopping to chat awkwardly was not something I felt our friendship needed in that moment ? I hid like a big baby in the womens’ accessories section until he was gone!

Needing: a few more nights of good sleep. As always.

Questioning: what amount of cleavage is a classy amount of cleavage. I have had the girls out a little more than usual lately. Slightly lower necklines and the like. Nothing too crazy or inappropes, but it’s kind of a big deal for me. I always worry people will judge me even though they shouldn’t and probably wouldn’t. I think I hid my chest area completely when I got pregnant with the Little Mister and had a bad rash (in 2011) and never got my confidence back again.

Smelling: nothing. No news is good news.

Following: the Facebook page of a local personal trainer who does group boot camps on the beach nearby. Her class times sound really good, I love being at the beach, I need to do something like this, but I haven’t figured out if I can commit yet. So I am watching quietly and biding my time like a really good stalker.

Noticing: that I feel nice and calm today. I’ve needed this after a week full of nervous energy.

Knowing: what I’m doing would be great. Generally. In life. Ha!

via GIPHY

Thinking: about my plans for the weekend. Hopefully I’ve struck the right balance between rest and getting out of the house enough to avoid insanity.

Admiring: people who are there for others, even when they have their own struggles.

Sorting: my wardrobe out still. I’m so excited to actually have clothes to wear this autumn/winter.

Getting: messages from my besties and just talking shit back and forth is always a great part of my day.

Bookmarking: silly videos I find on Facebook that I want to show Mr Unprepared later so he can laugh or cringe. I don’t know if my efforts are always appreciated ?

Coveting: those Dyson stick vacuum cleaner things. Or a Roomba robot vacuum cleaner. One day I shall have one. One day. Just not for Mother’s Day. Because that might not go down so well haha.

Disliking: not much right this minute.

Opening: my fitbit app is the first thing I do each morning. I like to see how I slept. Sometimes this is a valuable exercise and sometimes it’s a self inflicted torture thing haha.

Giggling: about my people watching adventures in the school car park (yes my life feels like it revolves around the school car park – can you tell). I see some really great things that make me laugh (in a not obvious way of course).

Feeling: happy right now. In this moment!

Snacking: has been a problem. Mostly because there’s SO MUCH CHOCOLATE in my house right now. I am not normally a snacker or a chocoholic but the temptation is just too great (and the PMS has been real too).

via GIPHY

Helping: myself to relax by having a quiet day seems to be working.

Hearing: birds making noises in the distance. Which is so much nicer than listening to the recent ridiculous night time cat fights (they are not our cats but they think our place is an ideal battleground – gah)!


What have you been up to lately?

100 Happy Days wrap up.

Yep. It’s me again. Talking about happy stuff. As usual. Geez. Give the corny gratitude shit a rest, you psychopath! Is what I imagine people think when they see yet another “happy” blog post title from me.

The thing is, I am not always happy. I get anxious, flat, sad and angry. And I don’t think it’s realistic to make yourself believe you can be happy 100% of the time. That’s a lot of pressure and a lot of inevitable disappointment, right? But I look for the ‘happy’ I can find, whenever I can. I work really hard at focusing on the positives – sometimes I succeed and other times I suck at it and figure tomorrow’s a new day. And that’s OK.

After 2016, I wasn’t sure what kind of year 2017 would be. I still don’t know – it’s only April! All I knew was that I was tired and that 2016 SUCKED. It had a very heavy, anxious, not-getting-anywhere energy about it. It was full of setbacks and disappointments. Insecurity.

Even though I know that we do not always have control over some of the shit that gets thrown our way, I really really really did not want 2017 to be more of the same. The one thing I could control was my attitude and my actions/reactions (well mostly haha).

When I heard about the #100happydays project, I was inspired. This would be how I’d start the new year. I would take a photo every day for 100 days of something that had made me happy.

An excerpt from the website…

People successfully completing the challenge claimed to:
– Start noticing what makes them happy every day;
– Be in a better mood every day;
– Start receiving more compliments from other people;
– Realize how lucky they are to have the life they have;
– Become more optimistic;
– Fall in love during the challenge.

Sounds awesome, right? I figured it would also help to keep me inspired and improve my story telling ability on Instagram.

So how did it turn out?

Pretty well! Sure, I took over 100 days to actually get there. But 100 photos were taken and lots of memories and cool stuff were recorded! I found myself looking each day for something great to photograph on my iPhone. Posting on Insta had gone from feeling like a sporadic chore to a fun part of my daily life. I found myself saying ‘yes’ to weird and wonderful things (a pumpkin festival anyone?) in order to experience the joy of something new and different! It was fun to capture those moments in photos.

While I admit that this challenge did nothing to quell my social media addiction, it did make me addicted to looking for beauty in each day. Even though I have officially finished the challenge now, I think I will keep doing more of the same. It really did make me feel good.

It’s so great to look back on the amount of life you can fit into 100 days!

I have only included some of the highlights here, but if you want to scroll back through all 100 days, you can visit my Instagram account: @awesomelyunpreparedblog ?

Would you consider doing this challenge? Have you done this challenge before? How did you go? 

 

The Happy List #50: Birthday Week edition.

Last week was my 33rd birthday week. Not just a day, but a week! I sure know how to milk something for all its worth haha. But y’know, sometimes you have to stagger out some of the celebration/s and somehow it just becomes one big festival of birthday. I am not complaining! I think being alive for another year is always something to celebrate, whether you’re 1 or 100! Or you know, some kind of obscure, non impressive, non-milestone number like 33. Although, 3 is my lucky number, so two of them next to each other has to be a good omen, right? RIGHT? Oh goodness, I hope so!

I had so so much to be happy about in the past week or so and I sincerely thank everyone who had anything to do with me enjoying my birthday so much. You’re awesome.

Here are just some of the many things that made me feel happy…

Celebrating with my MG (we’ve been over this – it stands for mums’ group)

We don’t just celebrate our kids’ birthdays, but our own too, and I was so excited to have a girls’ night out! Not only do these girls have my back in so many tough situations, but they’re a shitload (technical mathematical term) of fun to hang out with in the good times too. We had dinner and I had pork belly and mojitos and the bitches wouldn’t let me pay for anything and they surprised me with a gorgeous gift and man, am I a lucky girl.

Our night after that was just an average bogan night on the home town (if you lived here you would understand ?), but good company made it so awesome. We danced to ‘pub rock’ played by a cover band, the 40 something year old front man sporting dyed black hair and a ginormous flavour savour – which is how all pub rock should be delivered – and sang all the back up vocals loudly from the dance floor whether anyone wanted us to or not. I really think that classic pub rock playlists have not changed one bit since before I was born and that it is quite amusing.

It felt really good to be out and about, with a new outfit and a face of make up too. Feeling like I’d actually made an effort! What a novelty!

Getting my guitar out

Some of you may have already seen my Insta story on the topic, but basically I hadn’t played my guitar since some time in 2010. It’s a beauty and she’s as good as new because sadly, she got put away not too long after I received her as a birthday gift from Mr Unprepared back then. We had a quite terrible year that year, followed by a year in which we became parents (which is awesome but time consuming – HA HA HA) and I just never picked it up again. Just kept it in its bag and moved it from room to room.

I’d mentioned to Mr Unprepared that I’d love to get playing again (especially to share the joy of music with the Little Mister), but that I’d like to get a few things for it first. He listened and he took care of everything! I walked into my office on my birthday morning to find my beautiful baby with new strings, a flash tuner, a new stand and even a matching pick.

AMAZING. She’s more beautiful than I remembered and she sounds AWESOME. I am so grateful. I’ve got to face the fact that I will have to cut my beautiful manicure short to play properly but that’s OK haha.

Turns out I only remember how to play (I use the term ‘play’ very loosely – I’m no musical prodigy) Blink 182 songs…might be time to update my repertoire (and grow out a nice flavour savour BAHAHA).

Dinner with my little family

I appreciate any family bonding time as a little family of 3 so much. We hadn’t been out to dinner, just the three of us, in so long. It was so great. Of course we laughed our arses off at being in the restaurant at 5:30pm (a five year old’s hangry meltdown avoidance strategy) – it was empty! Mr Unprepared joked that he’d booked the whole place out just for us for my birthday. He thought he was Kanye West or some shit. It was great, though. The Little Mister was very well behaved and if he occasionally forgot his indoor voice, nobody was there to notice!

The food was great (it was so well presented I felt like a Masterchef judge when I shoved a fork into it) and the mojito was strong. Perfect! I think we should do that more often, birthdays or no birthdays!

Online splurging shopping

On my birthday, I was feeling really disillusioned with the current clothes shopping situation in my home town. There’s not a whole lot of variety to choose from at present. I was feeling frumpy again and I wasn’t sure if I’d have anything cute to wear for my girls’ night out. I also realised that I lacked a great casual wardrobe that is easy to put together as we transition from summer to autumn to winter. It’s that weird in-betweeny time.

Luckily, I remembered that I had internet access and some birthday money! After some false starts (dodgy aforementioned internet and some crap where I had to call my bank), I finally picked out a great wardrobe for myself (with everything 40% off)! Almost every top and skirt will mix and match, can be layered up for winter and should be fat day/PMS proof (fingers crossed I’ve nailed the sizing because I fluctuate like a mofo)! SO EXCITING. I am impatiently awaiting delivery!!

Getting my hair did

I was very excited to make a hair appointment for the first time since August 2016. My hair was getting really long and I would describe the style as blaaaaaaaaaaah. I was quite over it.

I went to my fave salon and they did some magical shit. We’re working on gradually lightening some panels under the top layers so I can rock some rainbow inspired hair (currently the turquoise is working for me). Which means I’ll have to go back again soon. Bummer. NOT!

I also got a beautiful cut – a long bob which falls just right – because my hairdresser is a genius. SO GOOD.

I know it’s such a cliche thing to say, but there’s nothing like a fresh hair style/colour to really make you feel good about yourself. It has given me such a boost!

It can be a bit hard to keep this stuff up financially, but I think I will try harder this year to prioritise it.

Other stuff that has made me happy:

  • Wrapping up my 100 happy days photo challenge – more on that later…
  • Absolutely nailing my ANZAC biscuit making
  • The Little Mister attending his very first ANZAC Day dawn service (and being so good)
  • Lilac fingernails
  • Surviving the school holidays with only a couple of “OMFG WHEN WILL THIS END” moments
  • Nailing all of my self care goals for the week – it felt so self indulgent but I must have really needed it – been through the wringer and back with all of the infertility/fertility stuff I guess
  • The Little Mister’s musings about just about anything (as long as he isn’t interrupting the grown ups incessantly or whingeing of course haha). He makes me laugh.

What has made you feel happy lately?

F*ck yeah, self care!

Oh, hey! How are ya? I’m pretty good because this week is my birthday week. You’ll find that I’m not one of those shy, don’t like to celebrate types. I think birthdays are frickin’ rad and that everyone deserves to feel a bit special as they reach the milestone of being alive for another year! I’m even OK with ageing! While I’m not always loving the look and texture of my skin, I’m pretty stoked with the stuff that makes me feel wiser each year. I wouldn’t trade that for anything at this point! Not even the completely on point, dewy skin of an 18 year old! OK, maybe…I don’t know haha.

Sure, I cried the night before I turned 20 but that’s in the past now. Did you hear that, family who still laughs at me about it? It’s TOTALLY IN THE PAST ?

I don’t often throw a big party or anything – last party I had was my 21st I think. I get too anxious and worry that nobody will come and it’s just all a bit awkward, truth be told. But I love a good pampering, a little trip away or a girls’ night out!

Since I’ve become a parent, I have really treasured my birthdays.

When people ask what I would like gift-wise, I am quite honest and blunt about it. I want something that gives me permission to be selfish. I don’t feel guilty about that at all. I work hard for my family all year ’round! This is one time I can stop worrying about being ‘sensible’ (well – within reason – you know what I mean?).

I’ve decided to give myself a little birthday self-care to-do list to achieve ASAP, which I thought I would share with you.

They are the things I don’t always do throughout the year, because they can cost a little bit more of my time, energy or moolah. Things that can be a little bit easier at birthday time!

Get my hair done.

I have already made an appointment and I am so excited because I am going to try something totally new. If it’s a success, you’ll know all about it in due time! I can’t remember exactly when my last hair appointment was, but I do know that I have put off going back to my fave place because getting your hair done costs money and I kept talking myself out of it. During birthday week, I say f*ck it. Also, a little gift money does wonders!

Order some new activewear.

I need some more tights, maybe a hoodie or two. Activewear that I can be in during the cooler months. I’m gonna splurge on the good shit that doesn’t turn see through when you bend over. I KNOW.

I don’t buy all the crazy brands. I’ll probably never realise my Running Bare potential or figure out the Lululemon thing. I’m probably not a Lorna Jane girl. But I do like me some nice, stylish Cotton On Body stuff.

I’ve been putting this off forever!

Get my guitar out again. 

I have the most beautiful acoustic guitar that Mr Unprepared gave me for my birthday in 2010. Problem was that 2010 turned into the year from hell, followed quickly by 2011 when I got pregnant with the Little Mister. I kind of forgot to keep playing (or even sleeping or going to the toilet alone). I hope that 2017 will be the year I start again. I’m not talented but I love giving it a go. Music is everything!

I need new strings and I’d love a good tuner. I’ll be butchering my favourite songs again in no time, hopefully! I’d love to share it all with the Little Mister (another big fan of anything musical).

See if a ‘lash lift’ treatment is right for me and if so, get it done!

I have shorter lashes. They are straight and they point down FFS. Mr Unprepared and the Little Mister have glorious lashes that are neither of those things. I am mad jealous. Great lashes are wasted on the boys! I only just found out about lash lifts and I am really intrigued! I am too scared of extensions and fake lashes, so maybe this could be for me? If so, I really want to give it a go!

Look into local group fitness options that I can afford.

I’ve struggled with the gym concept at times, but now that the Little Mister is full time at school, I wonder if there is something I could do? Something with the motivating group aspect that fits into my life timetable, isn’t prohibitively expensive and doesn’t make me freak out about being locked into anything. I don’t always love all the classes offered at the local gyms and I just want to get my money’s worth while getting fit and working on my health.

I know there’s a heap of stuff out there I can try, but I need to try harder to invest my time into narrowing those options down and picking something just right for me. I’d love to try something outdoors in a park type environment. I don’t always love being cooped up inside. I got close to joining a gym with my old school buddy who so kindly offered to go through it all with me, but the timing was a bit off (financially) and I admit I got cold feet and lost momentum. I must try harder!

Enjoy a girls’ night out.

It’s been forever! I have a little something planned for the weekend and I can’t wait!


I don’t have a set timeline on some of these things, but I want to make them a priority. Wish me luck!

What’s on your self care to-do list?

The Happy List #49

Well, hello there Monday! How the hell are you?

I am glad it’s a new week. Last week was quite emotionally draining. I made the most of it and there were definitely lots of positives to be experienced, but I think that the craziness that was my March finally hit me. You know when you’re in survival mode, so everything’s go go go and you don’t have time to think or even feel? And then you finally come back to a baseline of normality and it’s a bit of a crash? That.

So I’ve decided to start this fresh week with a focus on the positives!

Here are some things that have made me happy recently ?

Not having to make school lunches/do school runs/wake up earlier than my kid.

Yep. For almost 3 weeks, I do not have to pack a single lunch box. YES. That is one definite highlight of the school holidays around here haha. While I do still have to feed my child (it’s kind of uncool not to), I won’t have to worry about what fits in the lunchbox or being as strict about what I put on his plate. There’s no ‘night before’ deadline to freak out about each evening when everyone’s exhausted. I can make it on the spot while the Little Mister whines at me each day. Ha!

Not having to do school pick ups and drop offs will save me a couple of hours a day. And it means our daily routine can be a bit more relaxed. I have a few things planned for my quality time with the Little Mister which is nice.

Instead of waking at 6:15am each morning, I get to wake up at 7am. This is exciting (because I clearly have a lot going on).

While I’m aware of several drawbacks of school holidays, this is a HAPPY list so shhhhh. I’ll be driven insane soon enough hahaha.

My #kezgetsphysical achievements over the last two weeks.

I have been looking after myself more. It can be hard to make myself and exercise a priority but I pushed through and exercised properly 6 times in the last week and a half or so. I ate a bit cleaner (things weren’t perfect and I am not too worried about that). I think that all of this helped my mental health and I really am enjoying the fact that my body already feels better. I am less bloated and I am tightening up all the bits that were getting a bit softer/wobblier after a bit too much time off.

I lost a total of 1.2kg and I am hoping to bust through my usual plateau soon, so I don’t have to keep coming back to the same spot over and over!

The school holidays may prove a little challenging for me, but lots of YouTube work outs and spontaneous dance parties with the Little Mister will hopefully make up for the lack of treadmill time aka alone time haha.

I’m really happy because I do not take my health or my ability to do what I want with my body for granted after some of the fertility stuff I’ve had to deal with in the last 2-3 years.

Fresh air at my parents’ house.

I don’t know whether it’s the change in the air from summer to autumn, but I’ve been getting so much pleasure from standing outside at my parents’ place (they live on 5 acres), looking at the trees and taking in nice deep breaths of fresh air. I know. I sound so zen. I’m not but I like to fake it ’til I make it haha.

Group video chatting with the fam on my brother’s 30th birthday.

My family can be a bit scattered all over the place at times. My brother is in Spain right now – his treat to himself for surviving the first 30 years of his life! My parents were recently at a location wedding. We wanted to catch up so we had to school ourselves on group video chat technology. Tip: Messenger is pretty good.

It was pretty funny. We made fun of ourselves for all being old now (with the exception of the Little Mister). My brother kept disappearing and cutting out – that was when he didn’t have a terrible robot voice.

I just love how people can be ‘together’ even when they’re all over the world now.

A surprisingly productive work week.

It felt good to get lots of stuff done. I was really lucky to have an amazing a bit of copywriting work thrown my way and I’ve really enjoyed it. I think that because life has calmed down a little (for now anyway), I was able to really knuckle down with less distractions/disruptions. Felt good.

Here are some other things that have made me happy:

  • Having a quiet drink when I feel like it.
  • Being able to confide in my friends (both online and offline).
  • Apple with peanut butter – best snack ever! How has it taken this long for me to get on board?
  • The fact that it’s April – one of my favourite months of the year. My brother’s birthday, mine and Easter have always come together. I also love those mild (but still pleasantly sunny/warm) Autumn feels.
  • Reading a little more – right now it’s The Wrong Girl by Zoe Foster Blake.
  • It’s been a few days now and I still haven’t messed up my side of the bathroom vanity!
  • Snuggles with Mr Unprepared. Laughs too.
  • Rewatching Offspring on Netflix. Watching Billie and Mick’s fertility struggles has taken on a new meaning now. We weren’t struggling when it originally aired. I feel like I get it more now. I really do. It makes me feel so good that they touched on that.
  • Making little plans for activities the Little Mister and I can do these holidays. I know we’ll probably only tick off half the list (if that) but it’s nice.

What has been making you happy lately? Share the love!

A messy girl’s guide to cleaning up your side of the bathroom.

I know this will shock you, but I am not a domestic goddess. And by ‘shock you’ I mean, ‘probably not going to surprise you in the slightest if you even vaguely know me’.

I have a very busy brain and I can lose focus easily. Sometimes this means that my organisation skills suffer a lot little. I’ve had years of practice being me, so I have overcome a lot of these issues by planning better and making things easier for myself in life in general, but things do slip through the cracks. Especially when I’ve been out of my mind busy. Which is very different to being ‘got your shit together’ busy. Ha!

Lately, my side of the bathroom vanity was left to suffer. I’d been rushing around a lot – doing my make-up and then running without time to tidy up after myself. I’d dumped my stuff there rather unceremoniously after we got back from our recent trip to NSW and never really sorted it out. It was a f*cking dumpsite. Very embarrassing. I have photographic proof…

It looks like something from a hoarder’s house. Or one of those ‘rental tenants from hell’ pieces on a current affairs show. And quite honestly, I thought I’d removed any truly embarrassing items from view before taking the ‘before’ photo, but I clearly missed the tiny end of a tampon wrapper. I’m sorry. I can’t believe I’m posting this. Just #keepingitreal I guess!

Also, I should note that the martini glass was not used for drinking martinis out of and then abandoned (geez – I’m not an animal). Once upon a time, I had used it as a ‘trendy’ earring holder because I saw it on Pinterest like a bajillion years ago. You can see how well that went.

Anyway, I have redeemed myself. And it only took me probably less than an hour once I’d picked up a couple of basic things from Kmart (last of the big spenders).

Here is the ‘after’ picture (to help you recover from the awful ‘before’ picture):

I am not a perfect stylist (white flecks on the counter damn it) but I think I did OK! Mr Unprepared will be stoked haha (we have that stereotypical situation where his side is all minimalistic and tidy and mine is ALWAYS a mess).

Here’s what I’ve learned…

STOP KEEPING ALL THAT SHIT YOU NEVER USE.

I cannot stress this enough. I had make up items that I knew were the wrong shade for me, did not do my skin/lips any favours (i.e. dried everything out etc), or were so old that I could vaguely remember purchasing them before my son was born!!!

I had accessories that had once been really trendy but were now decidedly daggy and hadn’t been worn since forever. There was  cheap jewellery that had discoloured or gotten tangled up beyond recognition. Odd earrings. WTF.

What freaks me out is that this stuff had actually survived multiple clean outs! I do not know what I was thinking. If you think you’ll use it one day, but those days have turned into years, it’s got to go!!

I am going to be far more mindful of what I purchase from now on. I was never a frivolous spender, but I think sometimes when you’re trying to learn about make up or what works for you, mistakes can be made. It’s all trial and error. I think I’ll learn to gift it to someone else when appropriate or just admit that it’s never going to work for me and throw it away!

Be brutal. You can find info on how long is too long to keep certain cosmetics if you do a little internet research too. Helps to have a little reality check.

Put the ‘sometimes’ items away in a caddy for easy access.

I bought a nice open caddy style container (fitting with the theme of the above containers in the ‘after’ pic) to fit all the things that aren’t used daily, but that I go to regularly. Things like extra hair ties (I’m usually a hair down kind of gal but I do up my hair around the house when working out or on hot days), bobby pins, hair removal products (haha), face masks, eye shadow pallets that only come out on special occasions and the like. Everything’s together and easy to grab now. YES.

It’s also great that this stuff is no longer cluttering up my counter space. AWESOME SAUCE.

Group ‘like’ things together so they’re easy to find.

I know you’re thinking, DUH. THIS STUFF IS SO OBVIOUS. But I really hadn’t put any of it into practice before. That’s the key – who knew that actually doing it is just as important as thinking about it haha.

I put all the make up brushes together in one tumbler thingy. I put eye, brow and lip pencils etc in another. I put lipsticks/glosses in a make up stand so I can see them easily. Skin stuff in another container. And so on.

I think this will save me so much time trying to find my every day items. It will also make it easier to tidy up afterwards. It will take me the same amount of time to tidy them up as it would have to throw them down on the bench in a rush.

Now if only I had some sort of inbuilt motivation to clean my brushes as often as I should!

Bring the space to life. 

I’ve been working on activating ‘dead’ spaces around my home. I want every part of my house to feel alive and inviting. I have a long way to go, but I’ve been slowly working on it for a while now. I think that some of the more utilitarian type spaces of the house tend to get forgotten around here and they can end up making you feel flat and unexcited when you have to spend time in those areas and then they start to look progressively shabbier.

I bought me some cheapy fake succulents in cool geometric vase thingies and put them on a shelf that is usually strewn with clutter. Voila! Suddenly, I feel a teensy bit more house proud and happy when I look at them. They also serve the purpose of stopping me from mindlessly cluttering up the shelf from now on. It was a real problem spot!

Be on the look out for inspiration.

I love to get ideas from Pinterest and Instagram when I am not sure where to get started. I saw so many great ideas to draw inspiration from before I purchased some of my storage stuff for the ensuite. With so many on-trend items available at affordable prices these days (as well as great online tutorials on how to do it yourself if you’re crafty), it can be really easy to recreate your favourite looks/ideas. Just be sure to update things every now and then *cough* martini glass *cough*


So, tell me.

How’s your bathroom counter looking?

Got any amazingly spectacular/terribly awful pics to share with me? 

The selfie struggle.

Oh, yes. It’s a real first world problem, this one!

Lately, I’ve been scrolling through my Instagram posts and asking myself what I can do to make my account look a bit more appealing. Am I showing a great variety of moments from my every day life? Am I getting better at telling the stories behind the photos (and not just posting something with very little captioning that doesn’t make sense to anyone but me)? Does my profile look colourful and is it something that would make me want to delve further if I wasn’t me?

I think I’m doing OK-ish, by my small fish standards, considering I started off with sometimes only 2 likes on my very first photos and now I can get dozen/s (I told you – small fish haha). There is definitely room for improvement and I know I am my own worst critic too.

One thing I noticed that my profile is missing is more photos of me! I know that when I scroll through someone’s Instagram account, I like to see the person behind the profile – it helps me to connect with their content. Makes me feel like I know them (even though I don’t – they could be serial killers for all I know – hahaha). As I am no longer a semi-anonymous blogger, I know that I need to start showing more of myself. Let the people who find me, get to know me better.

I don’t take many photos of my son (I made a decision early on in the piece to not fully reveal his face or identity publicly online) and my dogs only know a couple of poses: “THROW MY DAMN TOY” or “BLURRY AS F*CK”. My husband is a bit social media shy. I feel awkward asking to take pics of/with my friends for public consumption unless they are bloggers too. So that leaves me most of the time. I’ve got nobody else to fall back on ?

I also need to point out that I am concerned that I have a misshapen head and I do not have a reliable Instagram spouse (and admittedly I’m picky and I feel bad bossing someone around), nor fancy equipment to help me take consistently good selfies/photos of myself.

And even if I did, I would curl up and die of embarrassment if people saw me trying to get it right in fantastic public spaces, like all the really cool bloggers do. Because we all know it can take like 50 shots to get one good one (or at least that’s true for me and my misshapen head/face)!

*awkward too loud laugh*

Also, I hate the stigma attached to the ‘selfie’ phenomena. Sure, if you’re doing a Kim K and ignoring all of your life to get constant good shotz (yes I used the ‘z’ ironically) then you may deserve a little bit of an eye roll from everyone around you, but what if you just want a couple of nice shots to prove to yourself that you were actually out on a nice day or to capture your life because nobody else will? I get frightened of people laughing at me trying to get the right angle and making that embarrassing selfie face which usually doesn’t look anything like the person’s actual candid face.

It’s always a bloody relief when I find myself out with fellow iPhone photo obsessed peeps who don’t mind taking lots of pics of everything and understand when I want to as well!

Also, I know I’m getting a bit deep here, but I think I lack confidence and do not accept my face/head etc as they are. I want to get more body (‘face’?) positive.

Some of my favourite pics of my friends are the real ones. Where they haven’t given a shit and they’ve just gone for it and had fun. I want to be more like that.

Anyway, here’s a selfie I took at a wedding recently. I liked my make up that night and felt pretty – I’d put in a lot of effort and it was a big deal because I hadn’t been out in the real world for a little while. The lighting is bad because it was night time and the quality is bad because I used Snapchat, but I’m glad I took it.

I’m going to try to take more selfies and care less what other people think while I’m looking like a dickhead pointing a camera at myself.

Anyone got any great tips on iPhone camera settings/angles/best sides/tricking people into helping you??

Kez Gets Physical: Let’s try that again!

Look, I had great intentions when term 1 of the school year began. I was going to work really hard on being one healthy little mofo and have amazing success like I did at the end of last year.

Then life got in the way.

In hindsight, I really did have some odds stacked against me. While it could be argued that there is still no excuse for not living as healthily as possible, realistically, I was going to struggle. I was sick for half of the term and the other half, I was undergoing intensive fertility treatments (no – I’m not pregnant – feel free to spread the word ?).

The best I could do was maintain my post Christmas weight (an extra kilo or so) and then accept that my diet and exercise routines would be disrupted, with me eventually putting on a second extra kilo for good measure (medically that would have been hard to avoid – long story – won’t bore you).

As we close out term 1 now, I see another opportunity to kick arse. I have a decent gap between treatments and I am so excited to have the freedom and the energy to do whatever the f*ck I want with my body. That’s been the biggest thing for me. Feeling like my body is my own again for a bit. No tests. No invasive procedures or ‘look sees’. Bliss! Maybe my fellow fertility challenged peeps might understand this?

I need to optimise my time and put in the hard yards to get ahead again.

I want to feel fit, strong, leaner and more agile. I also kind of feel the pressure to fit into all my new (slightly smaller) clothes I literally just bought right before I puffed out in the last couple of weeks (most of which was medically unavoidable – again long story).

I am proud of myself because we just got home from a great trip to NSW. Despite indulging a little, I came home the same weight I was when I flew there. I even lost some body fat! Yes!

Moving forwards, here are a few things I want to commit to:

Doing ALL of the work outs

Often I’ve chosen to (or have been advised to) pass on some particularly challenging/awesome looking work outs I’ve seen online etc. It was disappointing but important that I listened to my body. Right now I have no reason to fear anything. That feels so good. I am going to do whatever takes my fancy. I’m going to work my whole body and have fun giving anything a go. I actually crave all the initial soreness that comes with trying new things and I look forward to moving past that soreness and realising that I’m getting stronger/fitter. When something takes my fancy, I will bookmark it and try it at my earliest convenience. I can’t wait to see the difference that occurs in my body when I can vary my routine more. No more holding back. YES!

Avoiding food that isn’t the best for me

I’ve rattled on about this before. I just need to cut down on processed food and carbs and excessive sugar. Same old story. I just need to be more disciplined. I really feel like my head is finally back in the right place to get started again.

Weight loss

While I have a specific goal I’m working towards medium term, I will be happy if I simply lose more weight than I have gained recently. While I have mentioned that I’d like to fit in my clothes better, this really won’t be so much about the numbers on the scale. It will be more about feeling really healthy (mentally and physically) and living really well.

Drinking more water

I admit that I can be terrible at keeping up my water intake. Recently I was medically advised after a procedure that if I didn’t, then I could become quite sick (it’s standard advice for all who undergo this). I forced that 2-3 litres in a day and I honestly do feel better for it and I am glad the habit was created. I am finally out of the danger zone with my health, but I want to continue this regardless. My skin looks less scaly and dry too. I love not having chapped lips – they look waaaay cuter when I put on my lippie!

Documenting my progress to stay accountable

You can follow the hashtag #kezgetsphysical on Instagram or Facebook or Twitter, to see how I’m going! If you want to share something you’re up to that I might want to see/try/celebrate with you, then use the hashtag to get my attention! I’d love to share in your journey (yuck – “journey” haha).


OK, so there it is. I’ve so got this (again), right? I swear, if I get sick again, I’m going to get a bit stabby. But we’re going to think positive, aren’t we? Yes we are.

image: GIPHY